Musings of the Wife of a Pilot

Changes lead to adjustments...

2012-01-27T20:31:00.000-09:00

Shortly after Aaron came home this shift, he had an interview... with a local company... That starts at the end of February... We are both ecstatic! and at least a little bit scared (at least I am)

After 3 and half years of him being away half the month, every month, I have gotten used to spending time by myself, taking up as much of the bed and blankets as I want, and have my own schedule where I don't have to answer to anyone for anything... That will all change on February 16th (Feb 15th if I'm lucky)... Then, he will be home for good!

I need to remember back to a time when we were both here, both contributing to the household, both responsible for what goes on... It's hard to remember back that far...

Aaron's going to have to get used to a regular menu each month (or else I won't cook). When he's been home, I've overlooked his avoidance of planning for dinner. He usually doesn't even think of food until 8:00 PM or so... When I need to adhere to a specific grocery budget (and I will, starting this month), I NEED to plan what is for dinner so that I know what to buy and when, not to mention to relieve the stress of cooking meals after work and before school work...

I am looking forward to his help around the house more often. And the dogs will appreciate his presence as well... Lijha gets depressed when he leaves... She curls in a ball and mopes when she sees him pack his suitcase to leave...

Back to the crazy thing that I call life...

2012-01-03T15:45:00.001-09:00

Back to work... back to school... said hello and goodbye to some friends... sent my husband to work... didn't burn down my kitchen... all in all, I'd say it was a successful break. I took some time to read a book (Water for Elephants... haven't seen the movie, but the book is great!) I cooked a bunch... Basically, Christmas was pretty nice.

I did make my apple/pear butter. It was AMAZING. So addicted to that crap... I now have to keep myself supplied in english muffins so that I can snack on the awesome goodness that is apple/pear butter... I'll post the recipe and experience on my new project/blog (yes, another one) that a friend and I started... It will be a place where we can post recipes and stories of those recipes... Since she lives across the country, it should be a way for us to stay connected through food.

I kept with tradition for Christmas... I usually make Chinese food for Christmas Eve dinner... It hearkens back to a time when I didn't live near a Chinese restaurant so I was forced to make my own if I wanted it to be tasty... I did sacrifice the normal recipes for something quick and easy (still having flashbacks from Thanksgiving)... I bought some Wanchai Ferry Orange Chicken (not a fan, but it was good in the moment). I also usually make fried wontons, but I wasn't feeling that ambitious (see my previous statement about Thanksgiving). Instead, I found a recipe for baked spring rolls... Another post for my food blog... They were AMAZING and simple... although, it probably wasn't the best idea to use lumpia wrappers instead of spring roll wrappers... But what can I say... I couldn't find spring roll wrappers to save my life and the lumpia wrappers were right there... They tasted good, I've just never worked with lumpia wrappers before and some of the wrappers were thicker than they needed to be, causing us to eat the spring rolls with a knife and fork...

For Christmas Dinner, I took a page from my husband's family. They are from the American Southwest (ABQ, to be specific) and always make Posole for Christmas... So, I had a pot of posole going on the stove, a tasty pork roast cooking away in the crock pot, and taco fixin's in the making (my addition to the family feast... I just love tacos)... Although, after our day at the firing range to play with my new toy (yeah, that's right, I am the proud new owner of a Smith & Wesson 22 Pistol), we were so wore out (and cold) that we kind of skipped dinner and fell asleep mid afternoon... Best thing about this kind of mexican food? It keeps really well and kept us fed for days :)

Aaron and Lijha, passed out on the couch... Noni is passed out on the floor behind the table... Christmas Comas all around!

Spent the days around New Year's experiencing copious amounts of liquor... I don't usually drink to that excess, but sometimes, it must be done. Side note? I'm apparently really fun when drinking margaritas :)

What to do... what to do...

2011-12-21T17:02:00.000-09:00

I am on break from school until January 3rd... Seriously... I have so much time to myself it's not funny. So, I'm left wondering what to do with all my "free" time... Sure, I COULD work on those projects that I NEVER have time for (like organizing my spare room/office) but where's the fun in that?

I have something on my agenda for the next few days at least... I am going to attempt to make some apple/pear butter. Why? Because I have a crap ton of apples and pears, some of which I've been receiving in my weekly produce box, and some of which were given to me for Christmas. I know, it is sacreligious to even think about cooking a Harry & David pear, but I don't care... I'd rather puree it into pear butter than watch it go to waste on my counter because I can't eat them fast enough.

I'm not sure if I'm going to start this project tonight or tomorrow, but sometime soon. Maybe I'll clean out my kitchen tonight and make it tomorrow. I'll have to document the process, though... You know, for posterity :)

Insomnia, my (unfortunately) constant friend...

2011-12-12T09:23:00.001-09:00

When Aaron is home, I fall asleep early in the evening (usually between 10:00 and 11:00 PM). However, the last time he was home, he decided that he needed to wake me up because I was snoring (apparently, a lot). What he didn't know at the time is that it usually takes me a while to fall back to sleep, especially when I'm woken up in a way that is disorienting... He felt bad for disrupting my sleep pattern. I forgive him (now... I wanted to gouge his eyes out that last week he was home, but we'll just chalk that up to the sleep-deprived monster that lives in my skull and gets bitchy at times like this)...

When he is gone, I have insomnia... bad... I go HOURS and HOURS, tossing and turning in bed, trying to fall asleep. This is one aspect of life that I am looking forward to going away when he transfers back to Juneau for work in the spring (and will thus be home every night). I'm lucky if I get 5 straight hours of sleep at night...

Because of my disrupted sleep pattern at the end of his last shift home, my usual insomnia and the constant waking up at night several time pattern merged into one really bad night of sleep (over several nights, let's just be clear). I would fall asleep later, around midnight or 1:00 AM and then proceed to wake up again about every hour or two... sigh... I'm just now getting back into a pattern where I can sleep uninterrupted (and actually feel rested). Until yesterday...

I had a migraine brewing for most of yesterday and it got to a point where I had to close my eyes for the pain of it all. I ended up sleeping for about 4 hours straight, and when I woke up, I was EXTREMELY disoriented (thought it was 10:30 PM on Monday and that I missed work entirely, when it was actually 7:30 on Sunday), but my migraine had receded enough that Excedrin was able to chase the rest of it away. Relief... Until later that night when I couldn't sleep... Until about 4 AM... This morning... And I had to get up at 7:00 AM to go to work...

So, thanks to my insomnia, I HAD to go get a latte (and resist the urge to add multiple shots of espresso to the already spiked brew, in case it made me sick)... Pray that I make it through the day...

Contacts... Round 2

2011-12-09T13:18:00.000-09:00

A couple of year ago, I tried contacts for the first time... Within a month (or maybe 2), I had stopped wearing them every day and only wore them when I felt like it. Primarily, because my eye doctor insisted (at the time) that extended wear contacts were not available for people with astigmatism and that my best option were the daily wears... Ok... Well, I tried. I really did. When you aren't used to wearing contacts, your eyes protest for a while, but after a few hours (sometimes, all day), you eyes seem to get used to the invasion and you are at peace again... Usually this would happen about the same time that I had to take them out every night... It got to where it was a "chore" to put in and take out my contacts every day, so I saved them for special occasions (like when we would fly the Apache to Washington and I needed sunglasses, and my transistion-lenses on my glasses don't change when I'm inside the plane - or car for that matter). I was also extremely afraid of falling asleep in the dailies, because the doctor said I couldn't sleep in them... A "rule-follower" such as myself gets anxious when given those kinds of instructions - What could happen? Would it permanently fuse to my eyeball and I'd never get it off? (in hindsight, I guess I could have ASKED these questions to aleviate my anxiety, but it was easier for me just to not wear them)

So, it's been a while since I've been back in to see the eye doctor. This time, there is a new doctor in the clinic and I happened to get her. I told her about my issues with the daily wear contacts and asked if there is an extended wear option available. There is! And they had my prescription on hand in the extended wears (well, they had my right eye on-hand, my left eye prescription is close to the one they gave me but not spot on, so they have to special order that one for me). The doctor promptly put the lenses on my eyeballs and told me to leave them in for 1-2 weeks, at which time she will re-evaluate my progress with the lenses. Awesome :)

This, however, left me with a few minor issues. (1) I hadn't planned on actually WEARING contacts today, so I didn't have my case for my glasses with me. Luckily, they gave me one of their spare cases so I wouldn't mangle my glasses in my purse. (2) My re-wetting drops that I left in my desk drawer expired in 2009... Luckily, the convenience store I walked to for lunch had some. Not the brand I'm used to (but, let's face it, I'm not used to the one in my desk anymore either).

After the 10 days is up (when my next appointment is), I will decide if I will just get the contacts or if I'll stay with my glasses (my insurance will only cover one or the other)... In the mean time, does anyone have any good remedies for dark undereye circles? My glasses camoflage mine pretty well, but I lost that camoflage today...

Amazing Pumple Pie Recipe

2011-12-03T12:08:00.000-09:00

So, my mom's version of this pie is extremely easy... You take a deep dish pie pan and put a pie crust in it. Take a can of apple pie filling and layer it in the bottom. Top it off with pumpkin pie filling and bake like a pumpkin pie. Easy, right? I grew up on this recipe and it is quite good.

My version is a little more complicated, but the texture is much improved by making the filling from scratch. I say "make the filling from scratch" because I can't make pie crust to save my life, so I use Pillsbury's prepared pie crust, or Marie Calendar's pie crust (this one comes with the pie pan and is found in the freezer section). If you have a favorite pie crust recipe and have the talent for making it from scratch, feel free to do so. Another alteration I made to the recipe is to make it egg-free because of my egg allergy. I can eat some baked goods that include eggs (cakes, cookies, etc), but pretty much anything that is custard-based causes me to itch.

So, to make everything from scratch, it takes several hours (I won't lie to you). You must start with the pumpkin. I used The Pioneer Woman's recipe for Pumpkin Puree. The only deviation I made to it was to use my stick blender to puree the pumpkin after it was roasted (tried mashing it first, but the texture was too chunky). The good thing about this website is the exact step-by-step instructions that she gives (and the permission not to be thorough). It also comes with recipes for Roasted Pumpkins Seeds (Pepitas) and awesome Pumpkin Butter (another post for another time).

Once the pumpkin puree was prepared (and set aside to drain as it was rather moist), I started on the apples. The canned apples are rather slimy, but they are pre-cooked, which helps the texture of the pie. I found a recipe for a pre-cooked apple pie filling in my Joy of Cooking cookbook, but it needs some modifications before I can use it in the pie (primarily, a reduction in quantities). So, here's what I do for one pie:

Peel, core, and chop 4 apples (Braeburn, Fuji, or a mix of the two)

Saute the apples in 2 Tbsp. butter for about 4 minutes.

Add about 1/4 cup of brown sugar and about 1/4 tsp. of Pumpkin Pie Spice, and a dash of salt.

Continue cooking the apples until the sauce thickens, then remove from the heat and spread the apples in a thin layer on a baking sheet (or glass cake pan) to cool.

While the apples cool, the pumpkin pie filling can be prepared with the drained pumpkin puree. I found a recipe for an egg-less pumpkin pie filling Cooks.com. The comments on this recipe claim that it makes a very liquidy filling batter, but I found that it was about the same as when I make pumpkin pie the old way. I followed this recipe pretty closely, but I did use lactose-free milk, pumpkin pie spice instead of cinnamon, and vanilla instead of lemon extract.

To make the pie, layer apples (without a lot of the sauce from the apples) in the bottom of the pie pan. Top off the pie with the pumpkin pie filling. IMPORTANT - Put the pie pan on a baking sheet before baking - the apples will bubble up and it will make a mess of your oven if you skip this step. Bake the pie according to the pumpkin pie recipe. When done, let cool.

I make the pie the day before I want to eat it, but this is primarily because I don't have time to make it on the day I make a big feast. It doesn't need to be refrigerated (at least, my family has never refrigerated the pie, we just let it sit on the counter with a clean cloth over top.. I've never gotten sick, but if you worry about it, feel free to refrigerate it)

Serve with your favorite whipped topping :) In my experience, those that do not like apple pie (like myself) and those that do not like pumpkin pie (like Aaron) enjoy the combo in this pie. And it does make a difference to make it from scratch. You can make a very good pie by using canned pumpkin and canned apple, but the texture and flavor of ingredients from scratch make the pie PHENOMENAL! Unfortunately, I didn't take a picture of the pie, but I will when I make it again for Christmas :)

Some success, some failure

2011-12-02T16:24:00.000-09:00

So, I'm a little late in writing this blog post, but I'm in "whatever" mode at the moment... Not to be rude, just realistic (I'm tired, cranky, and overworked)...
Thanksgiving Dinner had some levels of success and some (epic) failures... I will post the recipes that were flat out AWESOME in a later post (read: I need to go home and find where I put the recipes), but I wanted to mention what went wrong...

The worst thing that everyone dreads while cooking any poultry happened - my turkey was still pretty raw (even after I double-checked the temperature with a thermometer... which shall be promptly replaced before I make another turkey). I put the turkey back in the oven. It took an additional 3 hours to cook... Not sure that my oven is working properly either... Hmmm... After it was (thoroughly) cooked, it was AWESOME because of the brining and seasonings, so I guess this one wasn't SO bad after all, we just didn't get to eat it FOR Thanksgiving Dinner...

I tried making homemade rolls... they sucked... I'm going to stick to Rhodes Freezer Rolls from now on... I know I can't mess those up...

Brussels sprouts weren't good either... I had one, Aaron "tasted" one (spit it out, so I'm not saying he "ate" it), and our guest abstained... Oh well, at least I used them in the meal...

Everything else came out good. The boys wouldn't stop talking about the stuffing/dressing. The pie was the best I have ever made - and that is saying something! I will definitely post the process at a later date (a combination of several recipes that is quite time consuming, but the results are SO WORTH IT).

Can't mess up potatoes and gravy... The gravy was good enough to make my rock-like dinner rolls somewhat edible (but I was the only one "brave" enough to try them).

I think I'm going to make Roast Beef for Christmas dinner... I KNOW I won't mess that up!

A rare treat!

2011-11-21T20:34:00.000-09:00

As any pilot's wife will tell you, holidays spent with pilots are few and far between. I do have to say that, over the almost 12 years that Aaron and I have been married, we have spent most of the holidays together. The last few years, however, have quickly been lumped into the "missing pilot" file. His schedule has been one where he missed pretty much every holiday for the last couple of years. This year, he is home for Thanksgiving and will be home for Christmas! What can I say, I'm feeling rather spoiled at the moment.

So, since we aren't moving (like we have over past Thanksgiving holidays) and he is home, I'm going "all-out" for Thanksgiving dinner. We have invited some stranded pilots that live in the area (can't make it back home for T-giving) and I am making a feast! This is not without its challenges, however.... Do you know how many years it has been since I have made a full turkey? Um, let's see.... I think it has been at least a decade, give or take a year or two... In fact, the last time I remember roasting a full bird was the first Thanksgiving we spent in our house when we were first married. If I remember right, I thought it was too much work for just two people to eat, so I decided not to do it anymore... Every Thanksgiving since then has been spent either moving, apart, or at someone else's house. If I made anything at all, it was a Jenny-O Turkey Loaf and a box of Stove-Top.

Anyway, here is my plan for Thanksgiving:

Apple-Brined Turkey (that I picked up today at the store for about $10 - would have been $35, but they were running a special - my original dinner plan involved a Brined Turkey Breast, not a whole bird... I figure that I can use the leftovers during the week)

Sausage Stuffing/Dressing (Aaron calls it "stuffing," but since I won't actually be stuffing the bird with it, it is technically "dressing")

Mashed Potatoes & Gravy (it is not Thanksgiving in my house without it!)

Asparagus w/ Bacon-Gouda Sauce (I haven't decided if I'm going to grill them or steam them... I guess I'll make that decision on Thursday based on the availability of my broiler)

Grilled Brussels Sprouts (only because I'm getting these in my produce box this week... they are a last minute addition to my menu and the first time I will be using a recipe to grill them... I hope they are tasty)

Cranberry Sauce (the jellied kind - Aaron's favorite)

Fresh Rolls w/ Sweet Cream Butter

Pumple Pie ("Pumpkin/Apple Pie" - old family recipe with a few modifications to accommodate my egg allergy and using REAL PUMPKINS, which I ordered, thinking I wouldn't find a good egg-free pumpkin pie recipe so I was going to make a Pumpkin-Apple Crisp so I could still get my favorite combo for dessert)

That's it, so far... But I keep adding to the menu... Maybe, if I get ambitious enough, I may take pictures of the meal before it is devoured... And since it is such a "special" occasion for me, I might even dress up a little... But, then again, with such an ambitious menu, maybe not...

How to deal with your pilot...

2011-10-31T22:37:00.000-08:00

When your pilot is away for some time (like mine is for two-weeks at a time), integrating him into the daily household routine is difficult, usually causing arguments and nastiness the longer he is home. Looking at both sides of the issue:

The person who is home all the time is used to doing things one way and she has to alter her routine to fit the pilot back into it. When the pilot comes home, the person who is always home is looking for some help and understanding after dealing with all of the household issues that came up while he was gone and her own professional responsibilities. What she usually gets is frustration and more stress.

The pilot comes home after working long, stressful shifts and is looking for a break. He takes his time, relaxing and focusing on his projects that have been sitting for two weeks. He does not appreciate the nagging wife. He feels unwelcome at times in his own home.

So, this seems like a big problem, doesn't it... How do these two people have their individual needs met, while making sure that the other person is seen to as well? What is the correct answer? Is there a correct answer?

How do dogs fit in with homework?

2011-10-03T21:43:00.002-08:00

Like this, apparently...

And so it begins...

2011-09-07T09:49:00.000-08:00

School started for me again yesterday... Already, I have one assignment completed and I have started my outline for my paper due this week... Hopefully, I will be able to keep it up!

On the plus side, I woke up to a blue-sky morning today. I haven't seen blue sky for several weeks. It is cool outside, so it is a nice, cool, autumn day. The sunshine is nice, though. It's amazing what a little sunshine will do for your mood.

A bad case of the "What Ifs"

2011-09-05T21:51:00.000-08:00

I have taken my time with this topic, but I feel I must share it with other pilot wives. It is something that most (if not all) of us will need to handle at some point in time.

As the wife of a pilot, different scenarios are always in the back of my mind. I tend to let everyday life distract me from these thoughts, but sometimes, everyday life brings them forward...

A good friend of my husband died the other day as the result of a mid air collision. Due to the circumstances surrounding the crash, Aaron was the second person on site and identified the airplane as the one his friend was flying that day. He is, understandably, upset.

As a wife, I was grateful that he wasn't involved and that he is OK. As a wife, I suffer because I can't be with him to comfort him. All I can do is listen over the phone as I hear him grieve for his friend. I can offer comfort through my words as he deals with the helplessness he feels about being on scene and not being able to do anything to help his friend or the other pilot involved. I cry with him because of the personal relationship we had with his friend...

As a wife, I also feel my own helplessness about the situation. Helplessness that the only thing I can do is talk on the phone when all I want to do is hold him close. The nagging thoughts in the back of my head are screaming "What If?" I know these thoughts are not worthwhile, but after an incident such as this, it is hard to turn that voice off...

Cutbacks...

2011-08-24T16:42:00.000-08:00

Cutbacks in flight hours means cutbacks in my monthly budget... I am getting creative to deal with it, which isn't easy when you are a pilot wife with no children. It is easier to go out to eat a single meal rather than prepare a bunch of food that rots in the fridge/freezer before you get a chance to eat it. It is not, however, less expensive than buying ingredients and making it yourself (I haven't calculated the cost of the ruined food, so I may be wrong there). So, the question is - how do I feed myself individual meals (that meet my unique eating requirements) without anything going to waste?

I came across the solution while reading my Rachael Ray magazine this month (before the dog peed on it, but that is another story)... There is an article in there inspired by her recent make-ahead meals that prepares individual ingredients that are frozen in individual quantities... This got me thinking.

If I can buy large quantities of chicken, beef, and pork when it goes on sale, then I can roast them in my favorite method, shred, and freeze the meat in Ziploc baggies in 1 cup portions. I can also make brown rice ahead of time and freeze the same way. Combining this method with other ingredients from my pantry and organic produce delivery, I should be able to feed myself (and Aaron when he is home) and save money in the process. I can use the meat to make soup as I want it (in the quantity that I want, rather than a large pot that I won't finish), or make enchilada/burritos/tacos, or toss with pasta or risotto, or make sandwiches... You can see where I'm going with this! So much versatility, with weekend efforts.

If you are a member of the Pilot Wives Club, I'll add my recipes there (along with some variations, for those with different tastes). I'll also add them to my other blog for my own record or to satisfy your curiosity...

I don't know why I didn't think of this before!

I see the light...

2011-08-12T23:57:00.000-08:00

... at the end of the tunnel! I have less than 3 weeks to go before I get my Associate Degree! I am excited, and exhausted at the same time...

The last few weeks of my final class (Algebra) are very complex and time consuming calculations. I've always been able to process the equations and such, so they are not really hard, but it can take 15 minutes to work through a complicated equation... Most of the time, when I get an answer wrong, it is because I didn't enter the answer in the EXACT way it wants it... Like, this evening... I spent 30 minutes working a problem and getting frustrated when the answer I came up with wasn't correct... After working through the tutorial for the problem, I found out that I DID have the answer correct, but it was missing a comma... A FREAKING COMMA!!! Seriously? And, once I found out that the problem I worked was correct, the program gave me a different problem to work in order to get credit for it... I had to spend another 10 minutes solving a new problem... (sigh)... I'll be so happy when this class is done.

I thought that 4 hours would be PLENTY of time to get my assignment completed and turned in on time, but it wasn't... It was turned in 15 minutes late, which is an automatic 10% reduction in my grade.

Day by day...

2011-08-10T00:24:00.000-08:00

That is the motto of my life right now... Just taking one day at a time. Every day is busy and stressful and eventful, especially this evening. But, I'll start by recapping the last few months since I haven't posted anything since June...

In July, we went to the Arlington Fly-in again. It was eventful, kind of like last year, but all the excitement happened at the beginning of the trip, as opposed to the end of the trip. The weather was crap when we flew down there. We filed IFR all the way, but arrived after the TFR went in to effect... Which was funny in and of itself... The weather was so bad that they couldn't have the airshow that afternoon, which is what the TFR was for. No one thought to cancel the TFR and the controllers in the area wouldn't clear us to land in Arlington because the airport was "closed"... So, we diverted to Skagit to wait out the TFR. Oddly enough, when we had problems with our door last year, we landed in Skagit to meet up with another Apache owner to get it repaired. Anyway, by the time the TFR expired, the weather was good enough to get to Arlington VFR, so we scooted on over there to set up camp.

The next morning, we woke up early to the sound of an intense downpour... Just awesome! The door on the plane doesn't seal completely at the top of the door when it is locked from the outside. There is a latch on the inside that seals the top of the door while in flight... This had Aaron crawling through the baggage door at 6:00 AM to flip the latch on the door to keep the plane from flooding... Then the rain stopped and we thought the coast was clear. We headed to the showers and started cooking breakfast... Part way through cooking bacon, it started downpouring again! Seriously? Yep... Now, I had purchased a shelter to sit in for shade and protection from the rain and to keep our camp kitchen while at Arlington... I thought that it would be fine.... Nope! The sides are mesh for bugs... Sideways downpour rain cuts through it... I'm sure it was quite comical to anyone passing (but no one did due to the storm) to see us huddled in a 3 sq ft area in the very center of the shelter trying to eat bacon without getting drenched... It was raining so hard that we couldn't even make it back to the tent! (Next time we try to use the shelter, I'm going to bring some extra tarps or sheets or something to tie to the sides for rain protection...)

Luckily, the rain stopped and didn't come back the rest of the time we were there. We thoroughly enjoyed our visit this year, getting to meet up with my aunt and uncle that live near there. We also got to eat funnel cake (missing from the experience last year) and play at the carnival (a new installment this year, probably won't be there again). We got to tour a DC-2 and met Mr. Paul Hajduk, the man who flew the glider during the airshow (amazing performance and he and his wife are super nice!). All-in-all, it was a good trip.

So, that was my summer vacation/weekend... Ever since I got back home, it's been "business as usual"... Busy at work, busy at home, busy at school... Busy, busy, busy....

One little bit of excitement (and not the good kind) happened this evening... Miss Lijha decided to ignore the command to go to the house (after a car ride) and took off after another dog on the other side of the highway that we live on... during a moderately heavy traffic time... She ignored my recall commands and my heart stopped... Thankfully, the dog she was chasing after was accompanied by a jogger, who recognized my frantic attempts to get a hold of Lijha (including dropping my groceries, purse, & keys and taking off through a drainage ditch as a direct line to the dang dog) and held her until I could catch up... Lijha got in LOTS of trouble and I was so upset by the ordeal, I put her in her kennel so I wouldn't beat her... I could tell I was getting that upset... Long story short? Lijha's off-leash privledges have been revoked and we are stepping up/revamping our recall training with Lijha... Thank goodness she didn't get hit by a car, but I could have killed her myself! (hindsight - when I noticed the dog go past the house, I should have taken the groceries into the house and grabbed her leash before I let her out of the car... lesson learned!)

Today was Aaron's birthday, which he got to spend in Bethel surrounded by LOTS of drama... I won't go into detail in this forum (at this point, but the story may come later) but it wasn't a GREAT day for him... He'll be home in a week, so we'll celebrate his birthday then.

If I end up not posting for a while, you will know why... I'm a busy girl :)

Planning...

2011-06-12T22:08:00.000-08:00

It is almost time for our annual trip with the airplane. That's right, folks... We are going to the Arlington Fly-in again this year. It should be a lot of fun...

So, we have a few days this month to get everything ready while Aaron is home. Then, we need to solve the problem of what to do with our fur-kids. Unfortunately, we cannot take them with us unless we get a campsite away from the airplane and we kennel them over there... Not fun for the puppies. Especially since Aaron LOVES to go from plane to plane and drool. Yep, he's a typical pilot who can be lost for hours in a sea of aircraft. Last year, we had friend that were here and they house-sat for us and took care of Noni. They live in Mississippi now. Our options at this point are to board them, but we'll be gone for about 5 days so it will not be cheap...

In the mean time, we'll be getting the camping gear dusted off and plan our shopping list. I can't wait. I really enjoyed myself last time, mostly because I got to sit by the plane as much as I wanted, didn't get dragged around the whole site, and got to take naps when I wanted... It was AWESOME! This year, I'll be representing the Pilot Wives Club as well, so hopefully I see some other members there. Less than a month to go! Sweet!

My Girls (in a rare moment)

2011-05-25T20:16:00.001-08:00

When is a King Size not really a King Size?

2011-05-22T17:19:00.000-08:00

When you have a German Shepherd...

Aaron lucked out in getting us a king-sized bed when we moved to Hawaii. He got one cheaper than the queens that were on sale, so he got it... We vowed never to go back to a Queen Size...

When it was just the two of us and Noni, it was perfect. But, then, Noni is small. There was always plenty of room, with Noni curling up in some random corner of the bed. Ah... those were the days...

Now, with Lijha, there is no more room at the inn... Sure, we all fit on the bed, but not comfortably. Realistically, there can only be 2 large bodies and one small body on the bed at any given time for anyone to be comfortable. I have woken up in pain every morning this past week... This morning was worse than the others... Twice this week, I swear she was trying to push me out of bed... She knows just how to work it too... She'll sleep on the floor in front of the door until we go to sleep... Then she inserts herself between us and pushes against one or the other until she is taking up half the bed... Of course, we don't notice until we wake up just what positions she has put us in...

I wonder if we can purchase anything larger than a King... Like, maybe an entire padded room for the times when all four of us are home... Yeah, that could work!

Have you ever hit the wall?

2011-05-19T20:26:00.000-08:00

It's funny how we tend to block out the "bad" times in our lives? Like, how we block out the pain of childbirth after we hold our children for the first time (or so I hear, I've never actually had that experience) or we forget how bad puppies were after they hit adulthood? Or how the really stressful and exhausting time at work that comes around the same time every year really wipes you out? Accountants know what I'm talking about... We are currently in the "busy" time of work at the moment and I come home exhausted every night. Sitting and staring at a computer screen for 8+ hours a day straight is extremely fatiguing... So much so that I could not keep my eyes open when I got home yesterday. I went straight to bed and took a 2 hour nap. Woke up for dinner and time with the hubby since he is home at the moment, then back to sleep for another 8. I am still tired today, but no where near as tired as I was yesterday. Yeah, I hit that wall hard!

Whistle Whining and Other Frustrations...

2011-05-06T22:43:00.000-08:00

Three weeks ago, Lijha broke her outside toe on her back left leg. I know, it hurts... I know, you can't go run around like a freak right now... I know you want to go for a walk... I know you are frustrated... Please, for the love of God and for the sake of my sanity, find a different outlet for your frustrations... Whistle whining makes me want do things that are not acceptable in normal society...

Before she broke her foot, she would do the typical German Shepherd whistle whine at inopportune times... It made me want to say "If you keep whining, I'll give you something to whine about"...

And, no, I wasn't the one who broke her foot...

Common courtesy request: If you are sick, stay home... I don't need to be sick (again)... Just because you don't want to take a sick day, even when you accumulate 2 days a month, that doesn't mean that you should get everyone else sick. BTW, telling me that you are going to stay in your office to keep everyone else from getting sick doesn't mean squat when you have to pass by my desk to go to the bathroom or enter/exit the building (my desk is in the entrance to the building)... If you "can't" take a sick day because of your work load, that is when technology comes into play... Log in to GoToMyPC and transfer your desk phone to your cell - With everything in our office going paperless, problem solved.

When you stay home when sick, you give your body time to rest so you can get over the illness faster and you keep from contaminating your co-workers... Just FYI...

(cough, cough, sneeze, hack, snort) - Yeah, that's thanks to my lovely co-workers who don't want to take a sick day... Thanks guys... Just what a chronic bronchitis/asthma/allergy patient needs... I'm not feeling well, and I can't tell if it is because of everyone else or I'm having an asthma attack or if my bronchitis is coming back...

Too bad my boss won't let me work from home (apparently, my job doesn't allow me to work remotely)... I could isolate myself from all the other sickies and keep myself from getting it.

Remembering Grandma...

2011-04-23T18:44:00.000-08:00

I have been busy today working on homework and cleaning my house and dealing with the vet (grrr...). I happened to look at my e-mail just a few minutes ago and I saw an email that made me cry. Not because of the content, it was a very simple e-mail that I get many of throughout the year. It was a birthday reminder that I have sent to me a week before a birthday so I will remember to send a card or something to someone (or at least call them). Today, I got the reminder for my Grandmother's birthday on May 1st. She passed away last year...

So, I sit here thinking about how she taught me to crochet and how to shuffle cards. I am remembering how she always let me have french toast for breakfast when I came to visit, and how with every dinner, she would steam a big bowl of broccoli just for me... Well, I tell myself it was just for me, but I had to share with everyone at the table. I look over at my couch and see my afghan that she made for me, with the words "I Love You" raised on the front... I remember so many great things about my Grandma and I miss her very much. I wish I could call her and tell her about my day like I used to. I know what she would tell me when I ask her about her day... She would say "Oh, I've just been here rocking my Samson and Delilah" (my aunt's dog and cat, respectively). My grandma loved to sit in her recliner with the dog and cat in her lap and look outside at the mountains while she rocked... I miss hearing her say that. I also miss her smell... You know, the smell that says "grandma"... Whenever she would come to visit my family growing up, she would sleep in my bed. I loved how my bed and pillows smelled like Grandma for weeks after she left. I'm sad that I'll never get to have that reminder again.

So, I'm going to have my little cry and remember my grandma...

Poor Lijha

2011-04-16T18:38:00.000-08:00

Lijha got what Aaron calls "the zoomies" in the house a little before I was supposed to go pick him up from the airport. Basically, she went into "spaz mode" and frantically ran around the house. She slipped and hit her foot on something (not sure if it was the couch or the bookcase) then came back to lay down. She started whimpering and yelping like she hurt herself. I looked at her leg, felt all over it to see where she was hurt, and noticed that her outside toe on her back left leg was sticking out a bit. She started limping and that's when I decided I would take her to the vet.

But, I first had to go get Aaron. I wouldn't have enough time to go to the vet before I picked him up. So, I waited at the airport. I heard the plane land, then I heard the announcement on the loudspeakers that the flight had arrived. I started calling his cell phone and after a couple of disconnects (because it was off for the flight) he answered. I told him to come straight to the car and we would pick up his baggage later. We went straight to the vet where she was examined. After xrays were taken, it was clear that she broke her toe. The one that was sticking out to be precise. It was a very obvious break too. Poor baby. She is now in a splint and is hobbling everywhere. She has to go back every 10 days to get it checked out (and probably rebandaged). If she happens to chew on her bandages, she has to go back in and have them replaced. She will be in the splint for a month. She can't run, and if we take her for a walk, it must be short and we must protect her splint.

Hopefully, this will be her "no zoomies in the house" experience and she'll be calm when inside.

And, of course, this happens just as she was able to return to normal activity after her surgery last week. (sigh)

Updates...

2011-04-04T15:31:00.000-08:00

With school and health issues, I haven't had much time to post anything new on my (main) blog. I finally got over my bronchitis, but it lead to allergy related asthma. My blood was tested for allergies and it was determined that I am allergic to eggs. So, now I am faced with having to alter my lifestyle. Since I have to do that to accomodate the egg allergy, I might as well get healthy while I'm at it.

If you haven't checked it out already through my links on Facebook, I have started a new blog to catalog my lifestyle change. I did it more for me, as a way to record what I like when I try something new, new or revised recipes, and my daily food/activity diary (posted weekly). If it helps anyone else out, then awesome!

You can find it here.

Please don't lump me in with everyone else...

2011-03-09T21:30:00.000-09:00

I am so sick and tired of being labeled a racist just because I happen to disagree with a lot of the President's policies... Seriously... I don't care that our President is Black... I wouldn't care if he were purple or green... I don't like his policies. That doesn't make me a racist, that makes me a human being with her own opinion...

This rant brought to you by the NPR exec who labeled all Tea-Partiers as "racist"... Is the Tea Party free of racism? Probably not... I am not naive... I know there are racists within the Tea Party... Just like there are racists in any group of people... To label all people that think the same way regarding the policies of the government as racist is ignorant. It is called stereotyping, and stereotyping is wrong... It would be like saying that all people who drive a Ford are redneck hicks!

I am tired of the name calling... What are we, 7? Yeah? Well, you're a doodie-head!

The art of being lazy...

2011-03-07T21:53:00.000-09:00

High stress loads during the week make me want to do nothing all weekend long. I just want to stay in bed and have no responsibilities...

However, the choice to be lazy on the weekend increases my stress load during the week, so it is a self-perpetuating cycle...

Too bad I won't get paid to sit around on my ass all day long and watch TV... I would much rather do that than study areas of the brain or do my laundry...

HA!!!!!

2011-02-17T15:57:00.000-09:00

Today is day 2 of Aaron being home... And he got to experience the same frustration I have been dealing with entirely by myself for 2+ weeks! HA!!!

Today, while making both dogs' lunch (the proper serving of dog food for each, but topped with cottage cheese), he stepped back right into a puddle of pee... That's right, folks! Lijha peed on the floor without alerting! And he thought I was just not paying attention to the dog or had mistreated her in some way so that she "forgot" her training... I felt so vindicated! He was flabbergasted! He kept saying "but she's been a good dog all day?!?!"

That's what I've been dealing with, folks... It's never at a "good" time... I've always been in the middle of something (as in this case, we were just getting ready to feed the dogs their lunch) and don't really have time to thoroughly clean the floors every 2 hours...

I'm so glad it happened to him this time! HA HA HA!!!

Progress...

2011-02-10T20:40:00.000-09:00

I have 5 more classes until I am done with my Associate Degree... I am scheduled to graduate on August 28th! Woo-hoo!

I also talked to one of my advisers at school to get my application in for my Bachelor's program. All looks well thus far. Classes for my Bachelor's program start in September, so I'll have a bit of a break after I'm done with my Associate Degree. It'll be a well-deserved break :)

Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Let Me Go Outside...

2011-02-04T20:35:00.000-09:00

I really really have to pee, so let me go outsi-ide...
If you don't I will go, right here on the floor...
Oops, too late, I just went, now I'll lick your face!
(did you have the Jingle Bells tune in your head while you read that? he he he)

Following the advice given on my last ~~freakout~~ post, I took a little bit of time this evening to make a "door bell" for Lijha to use to alert me to the fact that she needs to go outside...

She loves ringing it... It took once for her to "get it" that if she makes the bells ring, that I will let her outside... Let's hope this lasts and it is not just her excitement over the novelty of it.

Thank goodness we haven't put our Christmas stuff in the attic yet... I might have had to spend some money on jingle bells... Who stocks jingle bells in February?

House Training Hell...

2011-02-03T19:16:00.000-09:00

Let me set the scene for you... I am trying to focus on my schoolwork because I am currently failing one of my classes... I also have finals this week that I HAVE to do well on... Aaron is at work... And Lijha is driving me INSANE!!!

I understand puppies don't have bladder control and everything, but I should be able to get this dog to alert (whine, scratch on the door, etc) to tell me she needs to pee. Seriously, she used to alert all the time (but looking back, that was when we were taking her out in the front yard and she liked to run around out there)... She no longer alerts, she just goes to the back door... and pees...

I have been keeping puppy pads back there to "train" her to use those if she is in the house (and to make it easier to clean it up). But I swear to god she won't use them just to annoy me. In the last 2 hours since I got home from work, I have let her out no less than 6 times... but she has still been eliminating at the back door... Not "ON" the puppy pad, but right next to it... This causes the pee to spread out under the plastic lining of the pad and it goes EVERYWHERE! After the third time of having to mop my floor tonight because of the mess, I was on the verge of tears! I don't have time for this! I have homework to do, I can't sit and watch EVERY SINGLE MINUTE OF THE DAMN DOG'S ACTIVITIES SO SHE DOESN'T PEE ON THE FLOOR!! I CAN'T TAKE HER OUTSIDE (IN THE FRONT) EVERY TIME SHE "ALERTS" BECAUSE IF I WERE TO DO THAT I WOULDN'T GET MY HOMEWORK DONE!!!

Dealing with the damn dog is a lot easier when Aaron is home. He is a lot more patient with her... I know that most of my frustration is the fact that I am already so stressed out about school that she is pushing me over the edge... I just want to cry and scream and everything... But I can't because that will be horrible for continuing the training with Lijha... It could set her back... But, seriously... I am so tired of having to stop reading/writing/organizing/etc for my homework every 15 minutes to let in/let out/clean up after the dog... It seriously makes me want to turn her into an outside dog...

Mmmm.... Tacos....

2011-01-19T18:23:00.000-09:00

My all-time favorite food growing up was Tacos. Not the ones you get at Taco Bell, but the ones you made at home. Whenever my birthday came around, I got to choose what to eat for dinner that night (an awesome thing for a 9-year-old)... I ALWAYS picked Tacos.

Why all this Taco bliss? Because that's what I had for dinner... and, no offense to my parents who started the taco-mania, but I have changed the recipe (mwah-ha-ha-ha)...

I make an "adult" version now, made with pork roast. Basically, I put a pork roast in the crock pot and add whatever the heck I want. I think that the last time I made it, I added finely chopped onion and garlic (but I forgot it while I was making it today... it tasted fine without it). I also add some beer to the crock pot... an entire bottle of Dos Equis Amber beer. Then I season it with salt, pepper, cumin, and New Mexico chili pepper. Cook on low all day... By the time you come home from work, your house smells AMAZING! The meat is so tender from cooking in beer all day long, that it just falls apart. Shred some lettuce, chop up some tomatos, open a bag of shredded cheese, warm up some tortillas, and you have an awesome and easy meal!

Serve with some Spanish rice and a margarita on the rocks and unwind from your day! The best thing about Tacos is that I don't have to put whatever I don't like in them. I think that is why I liked them so much as a child. I was a very picky child and wouldn't eat a lot of items. My picky-eating habits didn't matter on Taco night! Even if I didn't want meat (ground beef), I could make a Taco with just cheese, lettuce, and tomato if I wanted... Or if I wanted more of a breakfast meal, I could scramble some eggs to add to the tortilla. Awesome!

Can you tell that I LOVE Tacos? Tacos Rule!

Time for change...

2011-01-12T22:15:00.001-09:00

I am tired of being constantly on edge about certain areas of my life...

I am tired of worrying about everything that I do, for fear that it will be wrong...

I am tired of losing sleep over this particular issue...

I am tired of hating my life in general despite the many things in my life that make me happy...

This particular area used to make me happy... I used to feel fulfilled and I had a sense of accomplishment...

My self confidence has taken a real nose dive because of this issue... I second guess everything and assume that I'm wrong all of the time. The uncertainty is leaching into other areas of my life as well. I wonder if I ever was talented in this area. I wonder if I really DO have a problem that means I suck...

I feel myself going down a dark hole, with no end in sight...

So, I'm taking my shovel and I'm digging myself out. I refuse to feel this way and I am doing something proactive about it. Something positive. It has begun!

Happiness is...

2011-01-09T20:25:00.000-09:00

As part of my new attitude this year, I will attempt to look on the bright side of things. I have been a pessimist for far too long.

So, despite having to clean up several "accidents", I have thoroughly enjoyed our new puppy. She is getting snugglier (is that even a word?) every day. Today, she gave me lots of puppy kisses on my nose for the first time :)... There is nothing more stress relieving in this world than puppy kisses!

Dinner was a new recipe - French Lentil & Rice soup... The recipe came from a Crock Pot cook book that my mother-in-law gave me for Christmas. I didn't even think about dinner until after my nap, so it wasn't made in a Crock Pot. But it was good anyway. I'm not a stranger to Lentil Soup (from my detox diet days) and have discovered a liking for it. This recipe is simple and quite tasty :)

French Lentil Rice Soup

6 c. Chicken or Vegetable broth
1 c. Lentils, picked over and rinsed
2 med. Carrots, peeled & finely diced
1 sm. Onion, finely chopped
2 stalks Celery, finely diced
3 Tbsp. uncooked white rice
2 Tbsp. minced garlic
1 tsp. herbes de Provence or 1 tsp. dried Thyme
1/2 tsp. salt
1/8 tsp. white pepper
1/4 c. heavy cream or 1/4 c. sour cream, divided (optional)
1/4 c. chopped Parsley (optional)

Stir together broth, lentils, carrots, onion, celery, rice, garlic, herbes de Provence, salt, & pepper in Crock Pot. Cover and cook on LOW 8 hours or on HIGH 4 to 5 hours.

Remove 1 1/2 cups soup and puree in a food processor or blender. Stir pureed soup back into Crock Pot.

Divide soup evenly among 4 serving bowls, garnishing each with 1 Tbsp Cream and 1 Tbsp Parsley, if desired.

**My Alterations: I rough-chopped all the veggies - I prefer a rustic style soup. I also exchanged brown rice for the white rice. I didn't have herbes de Provence or dried Thyme, so I used Italian Seasoning instead. I heated everything in a pot on the stove and brought it to a boil. Once it reached a boil, I lowered the temperature to simmer and I covered the soup until the rice and lentils were done... It took about 30 -45 minutes. I used an immersion blender and stopped before it got too pureed. I omitted the cream and parsley (didn't have any).

Updates and Outlooks!

2011-01-06T22:06:00.000-09:00

So, I've been meaning to update my blog at least once a week. Well, life smacked me upside the head in December, so I didn't have time to write down everything that happened last month... So, bear with me, as this will probably be a rather long post to update everyone on what happened...

In my last post, I commented on the fact that my kitchen took a crap on me... Well, it didn't actually take a crap on me, but the boiler did piss all over everything... It seems like it took FOREVER to get my kitchen back to working order, but it is now back together (for the most part)... I got sick and tired of living in chaos for 2 weeks while they took everything out of my kitchen, let the wall dry, and then to reassemble everything. After much pushing and prodding, they got my kitchen together 3 days before my Christmas company arrived... Aaron came home just before they finished (after being gone for a month) and helped me to put the house to rights. I sincerely hope that our company didn't hold it against us that my usual manically clean house was not up to standards. It was as clean as it could get after being in chaos for weeks and only having 3 days to put it all back. Downside? They didn't finish it completely. I have a working kitchen, but they haven't replaced my flooring yet. Originally, they told Aaron they would come to do it the week after Christmas (but didn't give us a definite date). Then, I called them to find out exactly when they would come to do it... I was told "Monday" - as in January 3... That day has come and gone and I still don't have a floor. Phone calls have so far gone unanswered. I'm just about ready to go get another contractor and replace the floor with what I want (instead of what was there) and still bill the condo association.

Just before Christmas, we heard that a friend had found a puppy along the side of the road... They knew that we wanted a puppy a while back and, since no one came to claim her, they gave her to us. We named her Lijha (pronounced like Elijah, but without the "E"). Aaron picked out the name - after a fixed waypoint on one of the approaches into Bethel. So, we finally got our new addition to the family. Aaron picked her up on his way home last month.Come to find out, she is mostly (if not all) German Shepherd. We estimated her age when we got her around 6 weeks, but we'll find out for sure once her teeth start falling out. She is already just about as tall at the shoulders as Noni.

Puppies! Notice, the gross sub-floor that the contractors left over Christmas

We had a wonderful Christmas this year. My biological father, step-mother, and oldest brother descended upon us for the week of Christmas! It was so great to get to spend time with them and share traditions. I haven't spent a Christmas with them since I was about 2, so we were due to celebrate. Aaron surprised me a lot this year with many things that I have been asking for... Like a professional grade Kitchen-Aid Stand Mixer (in red, of course), a new guitar (that is ACTUALLY playable), and a new computer bag that I can use for both school and work when I travel. We ate lots of good food and enjoyed each others' company.

My brother stayed for an extra week after the parents had to go back to work. He and Aaron got some good bonding time in and I enjoyed showing Juneau to my brother. He's talking about moving up here in about a year or so (once he gets his ducks in a row)... That would be totally awesome!

So, for the new year, we hope (and pray and make sacrifices to whatever gods will listen) that Aaron will get to come back to Juneau to fly sometime this year. We will be training Lijha for protection, since I tend to be alone with just the dogs a lot. Noni isn't very intimidating and Lijha, if trained properly, can and will protect me. I should finish the Associate portion of my degree towards the end of this summer.

And, since I can't end a New Year post without mentioning it... My resolution for the year is to "Get Organized"... I've outlined tasks that I want to complete each month to pare down and organize my life and my house. Cross your fingers and pray for me! It starts this weekend...

How was your day? Mine sucked...

2010-12-07T21:01:00.000-09:00

While Aaron is gone, I don't usually clean all the time, just when I have time, or it really needs it... Let me set the stage for you... I was sick for many days in a row, diminishing the amount of time spent in my kitchen... I don't think I opened the cabinet under my sink for about a week...

Then, one night while making dinner, I decided to do a little spot cleaning while waiting for my food to cook in the microwave... I open the cabinet door to retrieve my cleaning supplies only to be met by hot, humid air billowing out of it... The inside of the doors and the cabinet are covered in mold... Water is dripping from every available surface... Yeah, this was last night...

So, dealing "in the moment," I try to clean the cabinets of all visible colonies of mold. I also bleach the heck out of the doors... I leave the doors open, remove all items from the cabinet, and line the floor with towels in the hopes that it helps to dry out the space. With so much water condensing on the underside of the sink and on the pipes, it was impossible to determine if there was a leak. Then, I take my soup upstairs to eat dinner (finally)...

Mold stains on the cabinet frame...

More mold stains on the cabinet frame...

Mold stains/damage to Left Cabinet Door (the highest concentration of mold colonies...ewww)

Mold damage on the inside of the cabinet...

Mold stains and damage on Right Cabinet Door (double ewww....)

This morning, there was no visible moisture dripping from anywhere. The condensation had dissipated. However, there was still hot humid air coming out from under the sink. I ran water, both hot and cold, just to check for leaks (again), and there were none... I was late for work, so I left it there, thinking that it could be the boiler on the other side of the wall...

Boiler Room Situation...

The Culprit... The Recirculating Pump...

At lunch, I came home to investigate the boiler room... Here was the problem... There was standing water on the floor and I heard a hissing noise coming from an apparatus that happens to be located right behind my sink. I saw water dripping from this area, so I thought it was venting steam. I then contacted the condo association to advise them of the problem. I obtained the phone number to the plumbing company that services our boilers to have them come fix it. I met them when they came over, and we discovered (when we removed a packet of information from the area) that it wasn't venting steam, it was spraying water all over the wall... Awesome!

I then called a cleaning company to address the moisture and mold damage to my wall and cabinets. The sheet rock behind my cabinet is soft (not good)... The verdict? My kitchen needs to be disassembled, the cabinets cleaned and treated for mold, the sheet rock removed, the wall treated for mold, new sheet rock put up, my kitchen reassembled, and the cabinets refinished and my wall textured and painted... Whew!

I'll know more tomorrow as to when all of this will take place. The condo association is responsible for the repairs, and they seem to want to get the problems corrected now rather than later. I'm hoping that I'm not without a kitchen for too long... If it will take a while before repairs can be made, I'm going to have another contractor do the work to expedite it...

In the mean time, my aviator problem solver is on the other side of the state until the 15th... I know he is frustrated that this is happening and that he isn't here to deal with it. But, I think I have done a good job "dealing" with it thus far on my own and he needs to trust that I can handle it in his absence...

Has the world lost its mind?!?!?!

2010-11-24T17:36:00.000-09:00

I admit. I am one of "those" people who watch Dancing With The Stars. I enjoy watching the dancers and seeing what kind of choreography they come up with... I will also admit that I wasn't excited about the cast this season. I didn't understand why Bristol Palin was on there. I understood why "The Situation" was on there, but wasn't crazy about watching him dance. But you know what I realized? ABC didn't ask my opinion as to who should be on the show. Once the cast is chosen, quit crabbing about it people!

And another thing... The show is just that - it's a television show... A dancing competition that allows people at home to vote... It is for entertainment... (and I'm going out on a limb now and assuming at least one of these "crazy" people actually reads my blog)

An entertainment show does not warrant the behavior that has been reported. Shooting your TV just because someone you don't like remains on the show is insane. I would hope that the person that did that is receiving some medical attention for that kind of behavior.

To the people who have made death threats against the people competing on the show - You should be ashamed of yourself! For crying out loud, if you don't like what you are seeing, turn off your TV.It is never appropriate to make death threats against anyone! Seriously, has the world gone mad?

A month...

2010-11-15T16:46:00.000-09:00

It will be a month before I see my husband again... A whole month...(sigh)

What can I do in a month? Lots!

I can go on a diet, I can organize the house, I can teach Noni a new trick, etc... Somehow, it doesn't seem right that I can do some pretty drastic things while my husband is away... He SHOULD be able to be here to see the progress... But such is the life of a pilot's wife...

So, while I try to get those few things done in a month (very attainable goals, if I do say so myself), I will also be starting up 2 classes at a time again. I have finals this week for my ECON class, and then have an accounting and communications class starting next Monday. Pray for me!

My dastardly plan...

2010-11-09T20:05:00.000-09:00

... worked a little TOO well.

I gave myself 2.5 hours to complete my shopping experience, and was done in 1.5... I had the most amazing shopping experience at Nordstroms! I had an awesome sales person who kept taking the things that I picked up to try on into my own dressing room. Once I was in there, she kept bringing me other things to try. After all was said and done, I walked away with 2 pairs of work slacks (to go with my other pair at home), 6 nice tops that I can dress up or dress down, and 6 sweaters to wear with the 6 tops. Everything is mix/match. I can finish the overhaul of my wardrobe by getting some jeans at home and a few tank tops to layer under some of the tops (a couple are a little too low-cut for my tastes) and to wear under the sweaters for weekend looks. All in all, I am really proud of myself. And extremely thankful to the wonderful person who helped me out...

She even gave me her business card in case I see anything online. I can call her up and tell her what I saw and she will send it to me in Juneau. Absolutely fabulous!

All that fabulosity came with a price... It's a good thing that clothes are considered an investment. These clothes are going to have to last me for quite some time before I go on a shopping spree like this again. Total sticker shock for someone who is used to shopping at Wal-Mart.

Checking in from a winter wonderland

2010-11-09T11:06:00.000-09:00

This week, I have to attend a conference in Anchorage from Wednesday to Friday... I decided to take Monday and Tuesday off and go to Anchorage early to get some shopping in. As much as I want to "buy local," I have very few choices for appropriate clothing. The quality of clothing and styles available in Juneau leave something to be desired... Most people that I know buy clothes online, which is fine, as long as you know what brands/sizes to get... I do not.

So, I have a goal to purchase at least 5 different outfits that I can dress up/down, that are mix & match. I'll also try on different clothes so I can buy online later (you know, when I have more money to play with). As motivation to actually go shopping, I only packed 1 change of clothes... And the clothes I brought with me are fine for running around and meeting with a few people, but not appropriate for the conference I'm attending... Why do I need this motivation? Aren't I a woman, and therefore programmed to shop? Sure, but I think my programming is a little off... I get anxious when shopping... I have my homeopathic anxiety medication on hand today to help keep it at bay and I'm going to find a nice sales person to help me shop. I do not trust my judgment in clothes. I tend to have a panic attack and leave with a handful of clothes without trying them on first.

Another area where I will have anxiety is just driving to the mall... I didn't know it had snowed a bunch while I was flying in to Anchorage yesterday. Thank goodness that the nice people at the rental car company upgraded me to an AWD Crossover with an auto-shifter. I am so comfortable driving in the snow when I have an auto-shifter (it allows me to start out in 3rd gear so I don't lose traction on the ice - something that happens when you start out in 1st gear because the wheels turn faster). However, even with those options, I still almost took out a road sign with the car... I stopped inches short of hitting it... Talk about anxiety!

So, wish me luck! I venture out in about 30 minutes to start my afternoon plan :)

Why I hate election years...

2010-11-01T21:40:00.000-08:00

I appreciate the work that our representatives do across the state and for Alaska in Washington. I also appreciate the people who are willing and able to serve in these capacities. Election years are the way to allow the public to select these representatives on a regular basis. We (as the public) review the available candidates carefully. We elect the person or persons we feel will do the best job (or at least we should).

Partisan politics irritate the crap out of me. It boils down to 2 groups of children in a school yard... One group refuses to play with the other group because they have holey jeans... The other group refuses to play with the first group because they eat bugs... Each group blames the other for nobody playing fair... Like I said, irritating...

Another thing that irritates me is the election process... As much as I hate partisan politics, I dislike people who vote for someone based on what party they belong to. "I'm voting for Joe Blow because I am a Lemoncrat and so is he." Call me naive, but I don't think you should vote for someone just because they belong to the same political party as you. You should vote for the person that will do the best job representing you and your area. I know that is not the way things really are, so I will move on...

When creating political advertisements, candidates should tell me why I should vote for them, not why I shouldn't vote for someone else. That's like telling me to "Vote for me, because I'm not as bad as that guy!"... That's not a good enough reason for me to vote for you. For our state Senatorial race, I have heard ONE advertisement telling my why I should vote for someone. EVERYTHING else I have heard, from all of the candidates tells me what the other person has done wrong. The only thing that these types of ads do is to make me hate ALL of the candidates because I only know the negative. How about a little positivity?

I think it would be a good idea to create a non-biased political website giving honest information on all of the candidates for office in a given area - their position on issues, their history, pros & cons... You should also have the ability to compare candidates side-by-side to determine the best representative for you.

How to quietly turn 30...

2010-10-24T17:39:00.001-08:00

My birthday has never been extravagant. I remember being so jealous of my brothers (specifically, my older brother) because they usually got to have store-bought cakes and have friends over for their birthdays. I guess that's the kind of treatment that you get when your birthday falls in the first half of the month, aka: Mom's payday... My birthday, however, falls at the end of the month. Money was not as abundant at the end of the month, so I usually had cake from a box that on more than one occasion, I had to make myself... I only remember having friends over once, and it was only two friends... So, you can see why I don't usually make a big deal out of my birthday...

This year, I was so bummed that Aaron had to work. We did celebrate my birthday early (10 days early, to be precise) and it was a small celebration - just the two of us... He did try to make it special for me, but it would have been more special if he was able to be here to celebrate on my actual birthday... Such is the life of a pilot's wife...

On my actual birthday, I opted for a quiet day. Sure, I took phone calls from friends/family (to be honest, more people submitted Happy Birthday wishes through Facebook/texting than by actually calling me) but I kind of kept to myself for the most part. I went to the gym, did some shopping, and had a massage. I went to the store and bought a small piece of chocolate cake (because it just isn't your birthday if you don't have cake).

Given my track record with birthdays, and how much they tend to disappoint me, I wonder if I should just not celebrate them anymore... (she says while listening to her cool new iPod that her husband gave her for her birthday)

Three Strikes...

2010-10-17T17:36:00.000-08:00

After much deliberation and debate, Aaron and I decided that it would be a good idea to adopt another dog to add to our family and be a companion for Noni. This past week, my friend introduced me to a 3 month old puppy that looks just like Noni (although, with different breeding). We started the process by contacting the rescue group that had the puppy. Sadly, that one had been adopted already, but she had a brother that was still available. We read all about him and saw his picture and wanted him immediately! It was like the stars were aligning to help us grow our family!

I spoke with the rescue group today and completed an adoption application over the phone (they are in Utah). I answered all the questions honestly (although, now I wish I had lied). We were denied, and not because of our location...

Strike one - I have mild allergies to dogs... Nevermind the fact that I have found how to deal with my allergies with Noni. I keep her hair short to reduce the amount of shedding and I take medication to control my symptoms. I realize that allergies are not the fault of the dog, so I don't take it out on her... I couldn't get the woman to understand that if allergies were SUCH a problem for me, that I wouldn't have my extremely hairy dog.

Strike two - We have had to give up a dog in the past for reasons outside of our control. Just because we had to move and we were unable to take the dog with us because we couldn't secure housing that allowed us to have her almost 10 years ago, we aren't fit to take on another dog. We found a good home for her with friends, so it's not like we abandoned her on the roadside. But, apparently, in order to be a good dog owner, you can NEVER give up another animal in your lifetime and if you do, you are not worthy of having a pet.

Strike three - We don't have a fenced in yard... Since when did this requirement become mandatory? Noni has used the back yard for her facilities since we moved in to this house 3 years ago... It hasn't been a problem. Would I like a fenced in back yard? Yes... Is it practical for me to have a fenced in back yard? No... In 3 years, my dog has not choked herself while on her dog lead in the back yard, but that doesn't matter. Promises to supervise the puppy any time it was in the back yard were ignored...

This whole ordeal has left me feeling very emotional... They made me feel like I'm an unfit pet owner... Like, how dare I take in a puppy at the age of 3 1/2 weeks and raise her with care and love, never leaving her for longer than I had to. How dare I ensure that she has the best veterinarian in the city to take care of her (it's true, Noni's vet was just voted the best in the city). How dare I worry about every little wheeze or limp, and even go so far as to take her to the vet every time she coughs... I must be some bad person, some evil diabolical witch for not ensuring that the house I purchased had a fenced in back yard...

Well, I say, HOW DARE THEY MAKE ME FEEL THIS WAY! HOW DARE THEY THINK THAT I WOULD BE AN UNFIT PET OWNER. I could understand if their biggest concern was sending the dog to Alaska. But, with Aaron's jump seat benefits, he could (and would) go down personally to pick up the puppy.

But, no... My back yard isn't fenced, I occasionally sneeze in my house, and I broke my heart in two 10 years ago when I had to make a choice that was in the best interest of everyone... For that, I don't deserve a puppy...

Raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens

2010-09-27T21:36:00.000-08:00

I have 3 more days before Aaron comes home again. I am trying to have a positive outlook for the month of October, despite the fact that I live hundreds if not thousands of miles away from my family and I will be ringing in my 30th birthday alone because of Aaron's schedule. I'm not terribly excited about it. It's not really your birthday if you have to celebrate it 2 weeks before or 2 weeks after.

Maybe if I think "raindrops on roses and whiskers on kittens," I will be so happy with turning 30 that I'll crap rainbow gumdrops where ever I go. Or I could just drink tequila... Lots and lots of tequila...

The joys of Rheumatoid Arthritis...

2010-09-24T21:54:00.000-08:00

Ok, there really aren't any joys to having such a debilitating disease... but how else am I supposed to look at something that affects me so much?

I have been spoiled for the last two weeks. With a glorious high pressure system camped out in Canada for a while, Juneau was blessed with wonderful, non-rainy weather for about 2 weeks straight. Easing into that kind of weather system, I started feeling better and better. I had lots of energy, as was evident in my previous post.

Notice how I said "was" - as in past tense?

Sometime in the night, a major low pressure system moved just off the coast of Southeast Alaska, signaling the end of my glorious weather. Waking up this morning, it was like someone flipped a switch and turned my energy off. With my goals of walking every day, it was difficult getting out of bed this morning, but I did it. I didn't walk for a full hour, but if I had, I probably would have passed out from lack of energy. Coming home from the gym, all I wanted to do was go back to sleep. But, I had to go to work today...

I wanted a nap all day. I can tell a marked difference in my joints as well. Normally, it is my knees and/or my hips that are stiff and sore when I experience a flare up, but today, it's everywhere. Throughout my back, in my shoulders, elbows, hips, knees, feet... It's not painful in the "oh, my, that hurts" sort of way, but my joints feel tired.

I don't ever remember experiencing such extremes before. Normally, it takes a while for weather systems to affect me. That tells me this is a major system... I hope it goes away soon, or I get use to the fatigue enough to get everything done this weekend that I need to.

New Goals That Yield Surprises!

2010-09-21T23:27:00.000-08:00

For the longest time, I have fought the urge to join a gym or a health club. I just could not fathom spending so much money a month on something that I may not "do" fully. In the past, when I would go to a health club with a friend, I pretty much just did the treadmill. Now, my mind has continually counted how many monthly gym payments it would take to buy a treadmill for my house. In my mind, it was cheaper in the long run to just buy a stupid treadmill to walk on.

With the hectic lifestyle that Aaron and I have led over the years, owning a treadmill was not an option. Imagine the cost of transporting a treadmill across the Pacific, or letting it rot with everything else in a storage unit. Or the situation is what we are in now - we just don't have room for one.

So, I've gotten over my hesitation to spend money on a gym. I joined one a few blocks away while they had an open house special and I got a month-to-month membership for the same monthly cost as a full-year membership. Normally, it's at least $20 more per month.

Since I have made the monetary commitment, I have set goals to actually attend the gym. My first goal involves waking up early and going to the gym and walk on the treadmill for one hour. Starting this past Saturday, I got up earlier than normal for a Saturday and checked day one off the list. Day two, I decided to see if I could do the elliptical machine and alternate that with the treadmill. I learned that I am more out of shape than I thought. After 15 minutes, I thought I was going to die. I spent most of Sunday coughing like I had asthma. No more elliptical machine for a while. Day 3 and Day 4 were during the work week, and brought the un-Godly hour of 5:30 AM into my life... Surprising enough, I found that on both of these days, I woke up BEFORE the alarm went off. Another surprise, I'm ACTUALLY awake... Normally, I take forever to wake up. I may be functioning at 8:30 when I report to work, but I'm not really "there" until around 10:00...

As a continuation of my goals, after I've been walking on the treadmill every day for 2 weeks, I'll try the elliptical machine again. Once I get up to where I can handle that for at least 30 minutes, I'll alternate my morning routine with that machine, as it burns more calories and has less impact on my knees than the treadmill. The gym I joined also has classes I can take. This Sunday, I'll take in the Gentle Yoga class to see if I will integrate that into my schedule. As I get healthier and more confident that I can do more without injuring myself, I'll add in some weight/resistance training to tone my muscles. Maybe, I'll even add a Spinning class... But, for right now, I'm taking it slow.

One last surprise - My allergy attacks have subsided (and as I type this, I start sneezing, I think I jinxed myself). I'm not sure if it is due to a change in the weather as it cools down for fall or my new routine, but I'll take it! The last month or two, I've been having severe allergy attacks at least every other week. They are so severe, that it takes several days for my respiratory system to recover...

I want my life back...

2010-09-06T19:58:00.000-08:00

Almost a year ago, I decided that it would be a GREAT idea to go back to school and (finally) get my bachelor's degree... I was very self-righteous about it too! I figured that since I had spent the last 11 years of my life focusing on my husband and his career, moving so much that steady employment and education were not exactly part of my life, it was time for me...

After spending several months being stressed out from my new schedule, I still held to my convictions. Having a degree (especially since the prospect of a family is not a reality at the moment) was very important to me. I wanted to have a career and feel like I am contributing to our lifestyle...

Then came the months from HELL... Way too much stress in my life between my full time job and more demanding classes... Panic attacks were not foreign to me from the months of January to July...7 months of sheer horror... I hardly recognized myself after that experience...

Fast-forward to today... My class load is light and relatively stress free (an easy class). Aaron is home and is working on interesting projects in the hanger... So interesting that I want to hang out there with him, to see what he's up to, and to just spend little time I can with him...

Instead, I feel guilty for any time that I spend with him instead of on school work... When I make a judgment call and choose my family over my education, I get emails from my instructor telling me to do better...

Whatever, I want my life back... I want time to myself again... I want to be able to go out and spend a day with my husband without thinking that I need to finish writing a paper that was due yesterday...

But then, I think back to almost a year ago... When I had a goal of getting my bachelor's degree...

Crap.

Respect

2010-08-22T18:44:00.000-08:00

With all the changes in my life (my personal health and otherwise), I have discovered a need for respect. I have been flying off the handle a lot more than normal recently, and it has been affecting my marriage. I get irate when driving when other drivers do not participate in the "rules of the road", such as using a turn signal... My reactions are too angry and violent to be normal. For the most part, I can put blame on my new medication. Ever since I started taking it, my mood swings have been getting more severe. I need to talk to my doctor about it (and the fact that it isn't working as effectively anymore, but that's another story).

In the mean time, I have to deal with my outbursts in a healthier way. I have decided to focus my efforts on respect - feeling and expressing respect for others and myself. It seems to be helping in some areas, but it is a struggle. Especially when I feel that I am not respected as a person...

Today I had to do something that I never wanted to do... I turned in a neighbor to the police. Granted, I don't think that this neighbor was following the law, but still... This particular neighbor has been burning brush in their yard repeatedly since they took possession of the house several months ago. It makes it so I can't open my windows in my house because it will fill with smoke. Today was the last straw. The entire neighborhood was filled with smoke and the smell permeated my house despite the closed and locked windows and doors. I looked out my back door and they were burning brush (pine needles, etc) that creates a lot of smoke. I feel that this action is disrespectful to the entire neighborhood. Rather than go over there to have words with them (which would have escalated in an unhealthy way, in my opinion), I called the police department to determine what the law regarding open burning was. After describing the scene to the dispatcher, they sent a police officer over to see if they were complying with the law (one part of which includes having a burn permit). Ever since then, I haven't experienced any smoke.

I hope that the police officer was able to explain the law respectfully to these people. I also hope that they didn't tell them that it was me that sparked the inquiry. The last time we had to have a police officer visit a neighbor, we were the object of persecution from the neighbors. I really don't want that to happen here. I also don't want to smell smoke constantly... Decisions, decisions...

The great debate...

2010-08-19T11:52:00.000-08:00

Lately, I've been wondering if I should start taking flying lessons again.

Aaron got his CFI primarily to teach me to fly. Shortly after he obtained his CFI, he bought me a Piper Tri-Pacer for my birthday (hence, my alter-ego, TriPacerChick). I thoroughly enjoyed flying the Tri-Pacer, but my fears got the best of me. The answer to the question "why" didn't come to me until recently. I have evaluated the situation and have come to the conclusion that I am a perfectionist, and I tend to freak the @*#$ out if I feel that I can't do it for some reason or another (or I just shut down, one or the other). I lost the passion for flying when my fear overcame me. The excuse that Aaron was too busy to work with me once he started flying commercially was just that - a handy excuse.

Aaron has been pressuring me to return to flying for several years now. I have not appreciated his pressuring. In fact, it has pissed me off more than anything. I had a good heart-to-heart with Aaron about the reasoning behind my fears and hesitation. He does not want to instruct the way I want him to, mainly because he has his own theories on the matter. He is also a sadistic instructor, throwing all manner of obstacles in the way of his students to get them to learn to handle any situation. I know this and it makes me even more nervous.

So, the great debate is - do I take up the lessons again? I have a lot of mental obstacles to get over before I can. But, if I do, it will be on my terms. With Aaron being so busy, and away half the month, I would do part of my lessons with the other instructor here in town. Aaron has been working with him to produce excellent pilots.

If I am able to conquer my fear, and get my pilot's license, we will buy another Tri-Pacer again. Although, that doesn't keep Aaron from wanting me to learn to fly his Pacer (currently being refurbished in Texas) and the Apache... I don't think I'm quite ready for either of those options just yet...

Who are you and where the hell have I been?

2010-07-29T22:31:00.000-08:00

I feel like I have dropped off the face of the earth... Between being crazy-busy (like totally insane panic attacks and freak-outs) and technical issues, I have ignored my blog in favor of my sanity... I have ignored many things in my life other than work and school to the point of exhaustion, grief, failure, guilt, and a whole bunch of other descriptive words that I can't think of right now but they are right there at the forefront of my mind. My housework has suffered in the last 4 months, I've ignored my husband, gone through cycles of binge eating and not eating at all... Stress is a horrible, horrible thing...

I have dealt with the stress by removing some of the responsibilities that I have. It also helps that we are done with the "busy season" at work. I rearranged my class schedule to take just one class at a time for a while. God, what a relief it is. I feel like I can breathe for the first time in a long time. Almost like I am getting over being sick with something that has kept me down for a long time... I feel like I have the time to take my dog for a walk, cook AND eat dinner, wash the dishes, do my laundry, read my class assignments, and conduct research. Aaron hasn't been home since my class schedule changed, so I'm not sure how he will fit into my new schedule just yet, but I'm sure he will be delighted that my schoolwork is done in generally 2 hours max (rather than the 5-6 hours a night I was spending).

With all the stress from my last two (evil) classes, I was not very healthy. I ate food way too late (basically, around 10:00-11:00 PM, after I got done with my work and realized I hadn't eaten yet) and drank WAY too much Diet Coke. I also drank other beverages to help take the edge off (preventing massive anxiety attacks in the process). I don't normally "drink" that much, maybe a few times a month. And even then, it is usually only just one glass of wine, one shot of vodka, etc... My stress (and habits I was developing to deal with the stress) was leading me down a very bad road. I am so glad that the craziness has ended...

My indulgences are not without consequences, though. I decided a visit to my doctor was warranted immediately following my "finals hell." My body was not happy with the stress and my ways of coping with it. Which has lead to another round of detox. I detoxed last year, too, with successful results. However, I think that I am not designed to follow the "new" diet. After a week, I was still experiencing headaches (which usually subside after about 3 days). I also still feel fairly lethargic, and I should be getting my energy back by now. I vaguely remember that we had to modify my diet last time due to my hypoglycemia, but I don't remember how we altered it. Needless to say, I still feel like crap, extremely hungry following a meal, and I need to do something about it. Even adding protein (chicken) a day before the diet plan said to, and eating sweet potatoes as a side instead of brown rice or lentils, and I still feel like I haven't eaten all day... Hopefully, my doctor will come back from her conference soon so I can get more information on how to alter the diet so I don't feel this way. If not, I'll have to modify it on my own, which will reduce the effectiveness of the diet.

Expect many of my posts to be nutrition-related, since that is the ONE class that I am taking right now - so much more interesting to me that the stuff I just finished studying!

I need to send a special apology to my sweet nephews... With all of the craziness, I STILL haven't sent you your birthday presents (from back in JUNE! - #AuntFail). I am so sorry that they are this late and you should have them soon. First, I have to find a box that will fit them. They are a little too long to fit in a flat-rate box, otherwise they would have gone out a while ago. Your Uncle and I hope you enjoy them (and the paper they are wrapped in)!

Stupid Hijacking Viruses

2010-06-30T00:47:00.000-08:00

I started my evening making some progress on my homework. For once, I am ahead of the game and have several assignments in prep-mode to make my week easier. Then all hell broke loose...

A weird screen popped up on my computer telling me that I had several infections. My computer was running funky too. Web pages would not display.When I tried to open my Anti-Virus program to run it, I received a window that the file was corrupted and Windows would not open it... WTF

Thank goodness for alternate methods of getting on the internet. It all seemed a little fishy, especially since the ONLY method for correcting the situation was to pay for and download the specific Anti-Virus program that it suggested -AV Security Suite... Before doing anything more, I pulled up google on my iPhone to see if it was legitimate... I am glad I did that. I discovered that the program is designed to hijack your system to coerce you to give them money. All of the "infections" it said I had were bogus. Doing more research on my laptop (all of this took place on my desktop) showed that it overrides your internet to route everything through a proxy server (its own) and it bounce back to you with "virus warnings"...

Chances are, this program was attached to a recent download of a legitimate program I was updating. I want to say it was with the Adobe Flash update that I did... I seem to remember a checkbox for some type of Anti-Virus program...

Anyway, so I looked up ways to correct the problem. The internet is a wonderful bounty of information! I received pretty consistent data stating to restart my computer in safe mode, then correct the proxy setting in Internet Explorer, and then download and run a program called Malwarebytes. I already had this program installed on my computer, but I have the free version, so it only runs scans when I tell it to. The pay version supposedly runs scans continuously to prevent infections from happening...

I followed all the steps and was rather proud of myself for completing the task without Aaron here. He is the one who built my computer and gets irritated when he has to take hours to try and fix it for me (you know, because I break everything - but that's another story). The final step was to allow the computer to restart after removing the infections that it found...

Then, I got the Blue Screen Of Death..... Crap... Now Aaron has to try and fix it and HOPEFULLY he can do so without losing the data on the computer... I'm kicking myself now that I didn't back up my hard drive on a regular basis, especially since my computer holds the vast majority of our household records... I am extremely glad that I had the foresight to utilize a 4GB flash drive for my school work. Keeping my school work on a flash drive allows me to transfer from my desktop to my laptop to my office computer to do work.

So, this is a warning to my readers - If you experience anything like I did tonight, DO NOT buy the program and google the fix to remove it from your computer. Hopefully, the fix doesn't kill your computer like it did mine. If you haven't experienced it yet, I recommend installing and running Malwarebytes on a regular basis. Aaron and I have used this program for years, but I am not as good at running it regularly... I will now!

And, for anyone going to school, I recommend keeping your data on a flash drive and using that as your main school storage device. I usually copy the contents of the flash drive to my computer about once every couple of weeks, just in case.

Disgruntled...

2010-06-26T18:11:00.000-08:00

My day has not exactly gone as planned. After a successful day at the library last week, I planned to go both today and tomorrow to work on a paper due for my science class. The library is only open for 5 hours each day on the weekend, so this is adequate time to focus on my schoolwork and come home to enjoy my evening (read: clean house)...

All was going well until I hit the research phase of my homework. I remembered to bring my laptop with me and so I connected to the library's WiFi... It was disappointing... First, the internet would not connect to my school website, where I would conduct the majority of my research through the school's library. Then, when trying to do research outside of the school's website, the pages loaded SO SLOWLY that it was massively counter productive. I finally gave up and came home after a little over an hour, where I have a secure internet connection and can access everything I need...

The downside? I have MANY distractions at home that usually prevent me from completing massive projects/assignments. I can't stand absolute silence (my mind wanders more in silence than it does any other time) so I usually have a movie or TV on for some background noise. In some instances, it serves to allow me to focus on my assignments... However, if I am not interested in my school work or I am stuck on something, movies/TV can be a distraction...(Also include the internet in this distraction... Facebook is addicting when I don't really want to do schoolwork and I am already connected to the internet anyway...)

Noni is another distraction. She feels that when I am home, that I need to play with her the entire time. She's get frustrated with me ignoring her and she'll go find her noisiest squeaky toy and squeak it incessantly.

When I am home, I find it hard to ignore the housework that needs to be done... Laundry piling up, a sink full of dishes, dust everywhere, etc... My mind wanders to these tasks regularly. If I do these chores before I do my homework, I don't usually have time to do homework, or I'm too tired to do anything else...

I need at least 2 clones of me... That way, one of "us" could focus on school work, one on housework/regular work, and one that just enjoys free time, playing with the dog, hanging out with the husband (when he's home) etc... The only way that would work, though is if all 3 of us rotated tasks so that one isn't getting bogged down in that particular task. We would have to have telepathy, though, so that we would know what the others are doing. That would be awesome!

Breaking Bad...

2010-06-15T17:03:00.000-08:00

So, here's a little background as to why I haven't been watching Breaking Bad with Aaron all this time... For some reason, I have a very physical reaction to drug use in movies and on TV. I get very nauseous. Yes, I know, I am very weird... If it looks like someone is using drugs, or is washed out, or something, I get the same reaction. I can't watch The Crow, vampire movies, movies where the actor is on drugs but the character is not (Robert Downey Jr, back in the day). I even stopped listening to NKOTB because Joey looked strung out towards the end of their initial career...

I tried watching Breaking Bad in the first season, when Aaron became addicted to it. The first one I watched had Jesse getting high... Nope... Not going to watch it any more...

And I held to that. The only time Aaron got to watch it was when I was in the other room, he was in Bethel, or I was asleep. His (and his Grandma's) constant pleas to give it a chance fell on deaf ears. I knew the cast was fantastic and the story line was amazing, but I couldn't stomach the sight of the drug use...

Then, I watched one of the episodes while in ABQ a while back. There was no drug use in that episode, so I didn't have my normal reaction - which is good. I didn't know what was going on, for the most part, but I was sucked in... It was the one where the "cousins" try to kill the DEA agent. HOLY COW!

I didn't see the next few, because Aaron went back to work. Since I wasn't used to watching it regularly, I didn't think to turn to the correct channel at the appropriate time.

Aaron came home and I watched the last two episodes with him. The second to last, I wasn't really paying attention to. Jesse hit the drugs again (after being clean and sober for a while), so I tried to ignore it as best I could... Then Walt mowed down two dirtbags with his car and then shoots one in the head... HOLY FREAKING COW!!!

Of course! I had to watch the final episode. I think I was as excited about it as Aaron was. It did not disappoint... Poor Jesse...

Now, Aaron will be purchasing the first 2 seasons on DVD and we will have a Breaking Bad marathon when he gets back home in a few weeks. I hope I can keep my stomach from rolling long enough to get the back story necessary for me to fully understand the episodes that I have seen so far.

Updates!

2010-06-13T15:12:00.000-08:00

So, I promised updates... Here we go!

First off, you'll notice a new look to my blog. Blogger has made it easier to chose different templates and such, and I've been playing (with what little time I have - which goes to show just how easy it is to redesign my blog... what would have taken me at least a half hour to do took 5 minutes...) I'll need to pick a new header, as it is summer and the ice on the plane is depressing, but one thing at a time...

I had a great time at the MS Walk - So did Noni! We both walked for my mom. There were a lot of other dogs there, but no one else dressed their dog up for the event. Isn't she cute?

My team raised $3,000 for the MS Society. I had a goal of $100, but was only able to raise half of that. So, next year, I'll be a little more proactive in fund-raising. I hope they create a widget that I can put on my blog. They designed one for Facebook, but who looks at individual profiles anymore? I know I don't! The widget there has a thermometer that shows how much I have raised and provides a link to donate. I tried to do the same thing this year, but was unsuccessful. All I could manage was to link the MS Walk button to my donation page, which no one used...

I am a BzzAgent, and as such, I get to try out different products to give my honest opinion about them. I went several months without getting to try anything out and then I got hit with 3 campaigns... So I'm going to lump them into one blog post to tell you about them:

First - Scrubbing Bubbles Extend-a-clean Continuous Sprayer

I really liked using the product. The automatic sprayer makes it easy to spray down a shower wall without too much hassle. Usually, my forearm gets tired of pumping the handle. It provides good coverage, too. When I knew I was to get this product, I stopped cleaning my shower to "maximize" the experience. By the time I got it, my shower was pretty nasty... This cleaned it really well. However, because it was so dirty, I used more than I probably needed to and went through 2/3 of the bottle just cleaning my shower walls. The times that I used it after that, I used far less. I also used it to clean a really nasty window screen in my bathroom. It was handy, so I used it. It worked wonders!

It keeps the shower cleaner longer too. When you have long hair, you get shampoo everywhere when you wash your hair. This stuff made the suds from my shampoo slide right off the wall within seconds. All I had to do was rinse it afterward. Very nice.

You can't use the trigger upside down. That is one of the downsides. You still have to angle the bottle weird to get the inside of the tub (when turning it upside down seems pretty natural, at least to me).

The other thing that makes it not so great is the price. Depending on where you live, it could be anywhere from 8 to 10 bucks for the starter kit, and 5-7 dollars for the refill bottles. Given that you can use more than half the bottle on one cleaning, it could get expensive to continue to use.

As most of you know, I have a fragrance sensitivity. Depending on many factors, just about any smell can send me into an allergy attack. Shower cleaner is the worst. This stuff has a nice mild scent that only occasionally started an allergy attack, so it is pretty good. If you can put up with the cost, I would recommend this product to anyone.

Second - Dove Damage Therapy Intensive Repair conditioner

I didn't take a picture of this one, but it is wonderful! I love Dove hair products, but they have a strong (but pleasant) smell, which usually starts an allergy attack. It isn't good when your hair causes you to sneeze, so I had to stop using these products. I was glad to be chosen to review this product. When it arrived, I noticed that it has about the same smell as the rest of the product line, but it is a lot lighter. It does not cause me to sneeze, so BONUS!

The first time I used it, I was skeptical as to if it would condition my hair enough because it was too light. About the last 4 inches of my hair is pretty damaged and should probably be cut off, but I don't have time to get it done, so I just put up with it. The damage makes my hair very easy to knot up, especially if it is windy. This tendency makes me pull it up into a bun or pony tail, just so I don't have to deal with it. The day I tried this conditioner, I ran out of time for styling and couldn't find my clips or rubber bands to pull it back, so I left it down. I only blow-dried my hair, no flat iron. While running errands at lunch time, it was very warm so I had my windows down... BAD DECISION on my part, at least initially... My hair was flying EVERYWHERE!!!! And all I could think about was how I didn't have my brush or a comb with me that day... Then, I used my fingers to try and tame my mess.... IT WORKED!!! I ran my fingers through my hair, there were NO TANGLES and it laid down flat like it was always like that! AWESOME!!! I love this stuff!!!! I will never be without it again :)

Last - got2be Smooth Operator Smoothing Luster Lotion

I am not a big fan of this stuff. It is supposed to decrease frizz and smooth your hair, which it did, but it left my hair feeling "heavy". It has a smell that I'm sure some would call pleasant (my husband for one), but I don't find it very pleasant. It reminds me of something from my childhood that I didn't like, but I can't think of what it is right now. But it has the same smell. It did smooth out my damaged ends better than the Dove conditioner did, but I don't like that it is so heavy. I'm sure other people would enjoy it, but it is not for me. I have several samples of this lotion if you want to try it. Just let me know. I won't use them. I prefer my regular hair lotion.

No time...

2010-06-09T09:43:00.000-08:00

Do you feel abandoned? I hope not... I'm still here. I just don't have time to blog like I used to... Not that I don't have anything to blog about... I do! I have tons of stuff to blog about... Like how the MS Walk went... Or some of the new products that I got to try as a BzzAgent... or the updates on the plane and life in general...

However, school and work have been sapping all of my energy and time. And what little energy I had left over was sapped by some illness that Aaron brought back from Bethel... He's just starting to get over it, but I don't think I am even halfway through it yet... (sigh)... I am tired of being sick... I have been sick more this year than I can remember...

So, stay tuned! If I get a chance, I'll post about the above things this weekend :) If not, you'll hear about it at some point in time... (i hope)

The week from hell that allowed me to say goodbye... (part 3)

2010-05-20T22:44:00.000-08:00

So, the visit with my family was bitter-sweet. It was fantastic getting to meet my brother Joe's family for the first time. I loved getting to see my other brother, Jared's, girls all grown up (or at least almost there). My brother Josh was a constant joy to be around. It was the first time we've all been together in over 10 years.

I spent my time not doing school work and enjoying my family. The day of the memorial service, Aaron, Josh, and I desperately tried to finish the video for the service. My brother is a composer and we wanted to use his music for the soundtrack. Unfortunately, my mom didn't give him the message (part of her memory loss problems at the moment) and so he didn't bring it in the easiest format to use... We were cut short on time, so we weren't able to get his music files to work. Our back-up plan was put in action. We made it to the service minutes before it started...

Needless to say, it was a very emotional service. My brother, Jared, was in his military dress uniform. Cousins, aunts, uncles, and friends filled the church. My grandmother was very beloved. We all cried, we all laughed. We all made our peace with my grandmother's passing. I still miss her, but the grief is no longer overwhelming...

Aaron was very supportive during the whole thing. However, that night, he recognized the grief that I felt and I'm sure it reminded him of when his grandfather passed away a few years ago, and we were unable to attend the memorial service for him. He was very close to his grandfather. He desperately wanted to see his own grandmother. So, we cut the visit with my family short by a day and drove the 4 hours to ABQ to see his grandma. We arrived around noon and were immediately welcomed. I love going to his grandma's house. She is such a special lady and it eased the pain in my heart some to know that we still have a grandmother here. We were treated to Posole as soon as we got there... Much better than I can make here with fresh ingredients and pork that had roasted all day... I'm drooling now as I write this thinking about that Posole... Anyway...

We reconnected with Aaron's Uncle Tony, who took us around ABQ on the "Breaking Bad" tour. Aaron LOVED getting to see all the places where they film the show - one of which is blocks away from his grandma's house :) After the tour, we took Grandma Dora to Uncle Ernie's house, where we met Grandma Dora's sister and had a nice family dinner. Of course, this was a Sunday, so we all stayed to watch "Breaking Bad."

Our flight left from Denver the next morning, so we left immediately after "Breaking Bad" to head back to Denver. Driving through the night was exhausting, but worth the visit with Grandma Dora. We took two-hour driving shifts and made it to Denver around 4:30 AM. We were wiped, but that was OK. The travel gods smiled upon us that day. Aaron was jump-seating all the way, but my ticket was for 5:30 PM. We both made it stand-by on the flight out of Denver for Seattle and made it on the flight from Seattle to Juneau with literally minutes to spare. By the time we deplaned in Seattle, they had called for final boarding on the Juneau flight. We still had to list for the flight. Again, the flying gods smiled on us. We were 2 gates apart. Normally, you have to go from C or D concourse to N when traveling to Juneau, which adds time on the train in Seattle...

We made it home and bailed Noni out of jail, finally ate breakfast, and then took a nap. Aaron got to take it relatively easy the next day, but I had to work a 10-hour shift...

Why I walk...

2010-05-19T00:15:00.000-08:00

I was six years old when my mother was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. I turn 30 in October. That's 24 years of living with the disease... I have few sweet memories of my mother before the diagnosis... when she was relatively healthy...

Growing up, I had some semblance of a normal childhood. But, as I grew older, and my mom's abilities decreased, my responsibilities increased... It was the same for my brothers, but on a different level.

I love my mother very much, but there are times I feel she was taken from me at an early age. Which brings me to my point...

The illness has taken a larger toll on my mother's health in recent years. Her mobility is severely decreased. Where she was walking around about 50% of the time a few years ago, she is pretty much wheelchair bound now. Her mental faculties have been deteriorating for many years now, but it seems that it is getting worse as of late. She needs more constant care.

Thanks to the local MS Society Chapter, she has had her insurance reinstated (no thanks to the insurance company at my dad's work, "pre-existing condition"), she has a nurse come by a few times in the week to help her shower while my dad is at work, and she gets to go to a local group program a few times a week which allows her to get out of the house. Without the help of the MS society, my mom would be living a house-bound existence and wouldn't be getting the medical care she needs.

To give back to the MS Society, I decided to participate in the local walk for my area this year. It takes place this Saturday. I invite my readers to do something to support this organization. My mom is not the only one they help. You can click on the "Walk MS" icon on the top-left of my blog, to sponsor me in my walk. You can check out their website to see if there are any events scheduled in your area that you can participate in. If you know anyone who is afflicted with the disease, do it in their honor. If you don't know anyone, do it in honor of my mom, Alberta.

Coming up for air...

2010-05-18T00:13:00.000-08:00

It feels like I have had no time for anything personal and fun in several weeks. Between insurance renewal season at work (that will last through July) and travel for my grandma's funeral, not to mention finals for school, I AM EXHAUSTED!

I am also EXHILARATED! I finished my classes in my last block, to the best of my ability and sanity. I am sad to say that my business class bore the brunt of my lack of focus in the last few weeks... I will be LUCKY if I pass that class with a C. On the bright side, my research paper ROCKED! (At least, everyone who read it that is NOT my instructor has been extremely pleased with it. I won't get my grade on it until probably Sunday.)

I have some new friends that I met through the PWC that moved to Juneau to fly. Unfortunately, they are being transferred to Skagway (SGY) for the summer, so I won't get to see them as much as I do now, but that is what flight benefits are for. Jessie can jump seat down here to see me and it gives Aaron an excuse to pull the Apache out of the hanger if we want to go there :) Thanks go out to Partner of a Pilot for sending her my way! And MANY THANKS go to Jessie and Jeff for taking my mind off finals yesterday with some classic hanging out at a Mexican restaurant with a margarita! Without the much needed break they provided me (not to mention the soothing powers of the 'rita), I probably would not have finished my research paper in such a spectacular fashion.

After such a high-stress couple of weeks, mother nature rewarded me with a SPECTACULAR SUNNY SPRING DAY! There was NO POSSIBLE WAY that I could be in a bad mood today. I took it easy and went to lunch with Jessie. After work, we went for a nice walk, where I introduced her to the "hippie-free" but still spectacularly pretty trails near the river. Nice, easy, walk through the forest. And, no hippies. (No offense to any ACTUAL hippies reading this post, we have not had good experiences with some of the local "hippies" recently.)

I guess SPECTACULAR is the "word of the day!" Should we all scream like they did on Pee Wee's Playhouse?

The week from hell that allowed me to say goodbye... (part 2)

2010-05-11T22:20:00.000-08:00

So, we drove into Walsenburg around 9:30 on Thursday night, after traveling for about 14 hours to get there. We pulled in to the hotel. I thought it was a pretty good hotel on my many drive-by's on my way to my Grandma's house in the past, but I was wrong... Sure, it looks cute from the road, but it is just an "upscale" motel... Upscale because it looks cute from the road. We found a somewhat decent room, but it looked like the carpet hadn't been vacuumed in a while and there were many dead pill bugs on the floor in the bathroom... gross...

We were told that the hotel had high-performance internet, but I couldn't maintain a connection for longer than 10 minutes... So I wasn't able to submit my homework that night... bummer...

The next day was spent at my aunt's house. It was great seeing my brothers again. We haven't all been together in the same room since my wedding. It was crazy at my aunt's house, what with all the relatives congregating there before the memorial, so I wasn't able to use her computer to post my homework. I started working on some of my assignments in hopes that I could post later that night, but it was hard to stay focused.

That night, I tried again to get online... I couldn't even open my email. I tried to move to the lobby, where I assumed the wireless router was, but the signal didn't strengthen. I was allowed to use the computer in the lounge to send emails to my instructors to update them on why I wasn't posting anything. At that point, I figured that I wouldn't be able to do anything for school, so I decided to focus on enjoying the rest of my time in Colorado with my family... That's right, I blew off school work - sue me...

The week from hell that allowed me to say goodbye... (part 1)

2010-05-10T21:31:00.000-08:00

In preparation for my grandmother's memorial, which required travel, I worked hellishly long hours at work, and then at home for school, with the hopes of getting ahead on my school work... No such luck...

Between work and school commitments, I didn't start packing until the morning we were supposed to leave for Colorado... The plus side is that due to a mechanical at work, Aaron was able to come home that day rather than have to take the red-eye to Seattle, with the hopes that we would meet there...

So, Aaron and I headed to the airport, with all our stuff needed for Colorado (including ALL of my school work)... By the grace of God, we both made it out on the same flight (although, he ALMOST got bumped in Ketchikan - thanks to the other 2 non-rev's that didn't want to travel seperately!). After running to catch our next flight, the day turned into a "hurry-up-and-wait" kind of day. Neither of us had slept more than a couple of hours the night before, so we were both wrecked on the flight.

I knew when I made the car rental reservation that the car counter was not in the terminal and we had to ride a bus to go get it, but I didn't realize it was SO FAR from the terminal... Holy cow, that was a long bus ride...

We were debating on staying the night in Denver and heading to see my family 3 hours away the next day... I got a bug up my butt and decided that we HAD to get there that night... On the plus side, we had really AWESOME customer service at Enterprise and got an amazing upgrade on our (economy) vehicle to a Luxury SUV for less that the additional rental for a GPS unit... The Luxury SUV had the GPS built in... Let me just say, that if I had $50K to spend on a car, I would so get that one! Maybe some day. I loved driving it. Other than the amount of time we spent in Denver traffic (poor planning had us arriving in Denver during rush-hour), I wasn't fatigued at all once we reached Walsenburg. Ok, well, that may be a lie - I was wrecked... But I wasn't as fatigued as I would have been if I had driven the economy car for an additional 3.5 hours...

Gluten-Free/Vegan Update!

2010-04-22T15:47:00.000-08:00

A while back, I discussed the possibility that I may be going Vegan and Gluten-Free for my health. I was advised by my doctor that it is a beneficial diet, but that I would need to work my way into it gradually, so as not to shock my system. So, here is what I have done so far.

I have tried making recipes that use little or no gluten products. I've made some pretty nice soups/stews/chili's with no gluten products (using rice or potatoes as my starch). I've been introducing products I have traditionally despised into my diet and I am doing OK with them.

Starting this week, I introduced a goal to have a Gluten-Free/Vegan breakfast. My breakfast, thus far, has consisted of 1/4 cup of almonds and one Fuji apple. Actually, it ends up being a mid-morning snack, as I usually don't leave enough time to sit down and enjoy a meal, I just eat at my desk through out the morning. I cut the apple into slices and put the almonds in a bowl and eat it all morning long. I also have a cup of coffee with sugar added, no cream. I've taken my coffee like this for quite a while, weaning myself off cream several years ago. It also helps tht we have VERY GOOD coffee in my office. I want to say that coffee is gluten-free (but I'm not 100% sure)...

I'm going to see how long I can support the everyday breakfast goal and occassionally cook a gluten-free meal (if not vegan). In July, I will introduce a new goal to replace something in my diet. Probably my lunch... although I am not sure right now how to go about making that Vegan... This week I have also made "tuna-wraps" for lunch - drained a small can of tuna, mixed with salt/pepper and a little Bragg's, wrapped up in a leaf of lettuce like a burrito... Makes a nice, high protein, high Omega-3 lunch. But, it's not exactly vegan... I don't remember if Bragg's is gluten-free... I'll have to check the label when I get home. I know regular soy sauce is not gluten-free.

Strange happenings at the grocery store...

2010-04-19T18:27:00.000-08:00

The strangest of which was the checker that I was lucky to get (did you detect the sarcasm?).

Normally, my forays into the grocery store are pretty mild, especially since I tend to do the self-checkout thing... It minimizes the exposure to idiots...

Anyway, back to my checker... He was friendly enough, but he was a talker... And I think he had diarrhea of the mouth or something, because it was a steady stream of garbage and he just didn't stop... First, he commented on the fact that I was purchasing some chicken broth (what do you do with it - he asked). I'm thinking to my self "ohhh...kay... Who in the world doesn't know what to use chicken broth for" but I say, "I use it in chili, in soups, and all kinds of things." Which apparently was the wrong thing to say because that launched him into a story of what he ate for lunch today (basically describing the "i-don't-remember-the-name-of-it" concoction he pieced together at the store's deli earlier that day...) - yeah, I'm not sure how he made that connection... Now my thoughts turn to "should this guy be medicated while in public?"

I was also waiting for this gem of a checker for about 10 minutes... I should have picked another line... I don't know what made me stay in his line as he was R-E-A-L-L-Y S-L-O-W and took a long time to move everyone through... In the amount of time I was in his line, 3 other lines around me backed up and were cleared before he even started ringing up my groceries... I must have been out of my mind...

He also needs to go back to Bagging 101 to learn not to put health and beauty products (foot powder, in my case) in with produce... So not cool... Luckily, it was just my apples and not my celery...

The importance of wind...

2010-04-18T03:11:00.000-08:00

To see my take on "The importance of wind," click over to the Pilot Wives Club!

Everything will be OK

2010-04-17T14:44:00.000-08:00

So much to do... so little time to do it in...

I am currently working on a video that will be played at my Grandmother's memorial service in two weeks. I didn't get nearly the response I thought I would when I requested photographs of Grandma... But, I'll make do with what I have and honor my Grandma :)

My current stress level is adding to my health problems, according to my doctor. I need to let at least one of my commitments go... But what to cut? They are all vitally important to me. I think I have figured out a way to alleviate some stress, but it is just in the thinking stage at this point... Next week will bring the answers that I seek, at least about my options to reduce my stress level.

I am feverishly working on my school work... To get caught up again from this past week and to prepare for when I will be traveling and unable to work on my school assignments in depth... Yes, I know, this is just adding to my stress...

The next time I see my husband will be in Seattle (I hope) on our way to Colorado for the memorial service. Rather than come home first, we decided that he would jumpseat from ANC to SEA directly. This option allows him to work a day longer than I wanted him to, but whatever. It will be nice to travel with him to Denver, where we will then drive to southern Colorado for the family onslaught.

I haven't seen my immediate family in all one place for almost 10 years. My older brother is in the military and he and his family live on the east coast. The rest of my family is scattered in the Rockies. It will be nice to see everyone again.

I am already starting to get anxious about it. I share the same anxiety for crowds that my Grandma had. She would definitely NOT enjoy everyone getting together... Oh, she would love seeing everyone, but she would feel overwhelmed at the sheer number of people... I can relate... In addition to the anxiety I will feel at the Memorial service, I will be just as anxious flying. We had to buy a ticket for me to fly to Denver, and most of the seats were taken... I am sitting in the middle seat most of the way... This is not good... The middle seat is where I get the most anxious on a plane... Maybe I should start practicing my meditative breathing now, in preparation?

I've been contemplating my behavior lately... I think I am still grieving my Grandmother... Ever since her death, I haven't slept well. I haven't been able to concentrate as much for school. My appetite has been up and down... I find myself having depressive episodes, where I get extremely lethargic and apathetic. Or I get extremely moody and lash out at others. I am making a conscious effort to control this behavior, ever since I first noticed it. But it is difficult. At times, I want to say "Screw you guys! I'm going home!" (said in my best Cartman impression). Even as I write this, I want to go curl up in bed, pull the covers over my head, and forget about everything... Forget about my commitments for school, forget about taking my dog for a walk, forget about cleaning my house, forget about my responsibilities at work, etc... As you can tell, I am currently in a dark place right now... But I look out the window and see blue skies (a rarity here) and I smile... That smile warms my heart and reminds me to breathe... Everything will be OK.

Being healthy is not my reality...

2010-04-11T23:21:00.000-08:00

I have been sick more often this year than I can remember... Pardon the pun, but I'm kind of sick of it...

If it's not for weird symptoms that prompt a visit to my doctor, it's the flu or something else that has me in bed for days at a time... I'm pretty sure my employer is tired of me taking sick leave... I'm also pretty sure that my instructors at school are tired of hearing "My assignment will be late because I've been on my death bed..."

OK, I don't actually use the term "death bed" when I write to my instructors about why an assignment is late, but it was just about to that point this past week...

So, once again, I am behind at work (during a really busy time that I can't really afford to take time away from) and am behind at school... Granted, the class I'm behind on is a rather difficult and fast paced class... But still...

One good thing about being sick is that I got LOADS of sleep... Like almost 4 days worth of sleep... It's late and I still have stuff to do, so I'll most likely stay up to get it done... With any luck, I'll have my paper submitted by the morning and my assignment that is due tomorrow completed.

All caught up...

2010-04-04T18:37:00.000-08:00

I finally got all caught up from my week from hell (about 2 weeks ago). In celebration, I took yesterday off from school work. It was a relatively nice day, but too windy to go fly (comfortably), so we went for a drive.

We started out our day at Subway, to try out their new breakfast menu. It wasn't bad, and it was nice to be able to get breakfast after 10:30, the cut-off time for McDonald's.

After spending some time catching up with friends at the airport, we drove up to the ski resort here. It was a nice drive. I can't believe we've never been up there before. They are still skiing, but you can tell it is getting to be the end of the season.

After the ski resort, we drove around Douglas Island to the trail head at False Outer Point. We had fun hiking through the woods, trying to get to the leeward side of the point (to get out of the cold wind, mostly). It kind of reminded me of Rivendell from LOTR. Noni had a lot of fun running around off leash. She had so much fun that she worked her way out of her harness a couple of times... Not quite sure how she did that, but it was quickly remedied.

We took a lot of pictures hiking yesterday. Unfortunately, they are all on Aaron's camera, and he went flying today, so I can't get them... I'll post the pictures later :)

After we were done hiking, we went to lunch at The Hanger (a local restaurant here, not where we keep our plane). I tried their chicken burger, while Aaron had fish & chips. Lunch was really good. The downtown experience was rounded out by some gelato! Who would have thought you could get gelato in Juneau? Prior to last year, I wouldn't have thought it possible either. But it is really good. They don't make as much during the "winter" months as they do during the summer, so it was slim pickings, but I enjoyed my combo of pistachio and caramel. Aaron had mint-chip and caramel. Yummy!

We did go back to the hanger to do a favor for one of Aaron's forum friends. He needed to get pictures of a certain part of the airplane and it ended up being more work than anticipated. We were there for about 2 hours disassembling, taking the picture, and reassembling (several times).

Needless to say, my day off wore me out. After a hot bath with epsom salts and lavender oil, I felt better.

Today is being spent doing my assignment for today (which is almost done). Then I'll start reading my assignments for the coming week, to keep from getting so far behind. I should also have my medical test results by Tuesday, so I'm hoping for a promising result - something that is easy to fix. Cross your fingers!

Simple & Tasty Potato Salad

2010-03-28T15:31:00.000-08:00

Earlier in the week, I made a bunch of baked potatoes (intending to take them for my lunch, but forgetting them and having a sandwich instead). So, I decided that I needed to do something with them before they spoiled...
First, I'll start with my treatment of the potatoes...

My mother always smeared butter on the skins before she wrapped them in foil and baking... I love that treatment, but I wanted to try something a little different. So I seasoned some olive oil simply with salt and pepper (you could use whatever you like) and I brushed some olive oil on the potatoes just before baking. After they cooled, I left them wrapped in foil and put them in the fridge(it worked out to 5 medium sized potatoes, in case you were wondering).

Today, I decided I would try to make some potato salad with the baked potatoes. So I made some hard-boiled eggs (6 of them... I really like eggs in my potato salad). Then I cut up the potatoes, leaving the seasoned skin on the potato chunks. I cut up the eggs into big chunks. I also had some celery in my fridge so I chopped that up and added it to the bowl. You can dress your salad however you like, but I'm a strictly Miracle Whip kind of gal when it comes to potato salad. Sometimes, I'll add a little yellow mustard if I have it, but it is usually just Miracle Whip. Mix to combine well.

For seasoning, I added salt, pepper, rosemary/garlic blend (finely ground), and smoked paprika. It makes for a really great lunch!

My Personal Play-list

2010-03-28T00:01:00.000-08:00

I love almost all forms of music ([c]rap, heavy metal, etc - anything demeaning is excluded from my appreciation). My personal play-list of life varies with my mood.

When I'm frustrated, I have found that Alternative Rock speaks to my soul, specifically 30 Seconds to Mars. I have three 30STM songs in my iPhone and I will listen to those songs all day long when I'm irritated or frustrated with something.

When I am calm, I listen to classical/piano/new age music, depending on what I have access to.

When I am happy, I will listen to some other kinds of music... I guess you could call it Contemporary Adult? (Although, when listening to the radio and Taylor Swift comes on, I get frustrated and immediately switch to 30STM).

When I am upset or having a crappy day and want to cheer up, I love Los Lonely Boys. Their harmonies reach into my soul and elevate my consciousness. (OK, I know I got a little deep with that one... here, let me shovel some of that away, lol). Seriously, though, I really enjoy the way their voices blend.

Today, my play-list is from my childhood. My mother passed on an appreciation for groups like The Carpenters and The Beatles, and artists like Barry Manilow and Neil Diamond. I don't listen to them all the time, but on days like today, nothing else will do. So, I share with you some of the songs that speak to me today. I hope you find them as uplifting and motivational as I do.

Great advice from Paul... There will be an answer... Let it be...

Strange...

2010-03-23T23:44:00.000-08:00

Without going into too much detail, I've been experiencing some pretty weird symptoms over the last few days... Weird enough to prompt me to contact my doctor to discuss these symptoms... It could be normal (from what I've been reading about online), but it has me concerned... I hope I'm just over-reacting and isn't what I think it is... But, it's better to be safe than sorry... Keep your fingers crossed!

One of my guilty pleasures...

2010-03-22T22:24:00.000-08:00

I really like watching Dancing With The Stars. It's just about the only "reality" show I watch consistently. I like so many of this season's contestants, so I was super excited to watch it tonight... Here's my recap:

It is nice seeing a "macho" football guy actually shake his hips!

I'm disappointed that they put another hottie with Derek... Last season, he got a little too graphic for my tastes with his hottie partner... I hope he has the sense to tone down the overtly sexual dance moves... Even though his partner was a Pussy Cat Doll, he doesn't need to turn every dance into a strip show, or do a move out of the kama sutra. (I'm not saying he did any of this tonight - hard to do when dancing the Viennese Waltz - but this is for future warning/observation.)

I truly enjoyed watching Buzz Aldrin dance tonight, but I fear he will be the first to go.

There are so many attractive men on the show this season!

I almost threw up when Jake Pavelka's first dance was to "Kiss from a Rose" (In, fact, just writing this and reliving it in my mind, I kind of did a little)... I really want to like Jake, as he is a pilot, but dude, come on... And when he wore his black leather flight jacket WITH CAPTAINS EPAULETS, I laughed hysterically! Isn't he an FO on reserve (or possibly furloughed)?

I enjoyed Shannon's performance, but unless she conquers her anxiety of dancing live, she will be sent home early.

Pam was spastic... and her partner copped a feel...

I enjoyed Niecy's performance. I thought she was putting it out there. I hope she stays for a while. She has such a refreshing personality.

I'm a Kate Gosslin fan, but I didn't care for her dance. She was too much in her head. You could see her thinking "Arm flick - here, leg lift - there, etc" She won't last long in the competition. She received the comment "unique vulnerability about the dance" from Carrie Ann, which is the EXACT same comment Carrie Ann gave to Macy Gray last season, who was sent home first... Just an observation!

I know that Edyta is known for skimpy costumes, but tonight's costume was a joke... She was dancing the Cha-Cha with her partner, Aiden something-or-other, and wore something with fringe... About 6 or 7 rows of fringe starting from her cleavage line to just inches below her crotch area... The color of the costume behind the fringe was EXACTLY her flesh color, so you had to wonder what they were thinking. Initially, she was wearing a coat - which I hope I'm not the only one who found that odd - and when she took it off, the fringe was parted around her breast ala Janet Jackson... Seriously, this is family TV... I really hope she goes... too bad for Aiden though, he's pretty hot!

The rest were not memorable... sorry, but you weren't... Maybe next time?

Another Beautiful Day!

2010-03-21T15:26:00.000-08:00

I am amazed that we got 2 days in a row with nice, sunny weather! I'm feeling so spoiled right now. I took a break from housecleaning and writing a paper (due today) for school to go outside and enjoy it.

We went on a trail that is close to home (the trail head is about 2 blocks away) and goes along the Mendenhall River. This seems to be my usual trail, as it is paved the whole way and pretty easy. Because I had errands to run afterward, I drove to the trail head. About 8 minutes into the trail (I don't know the distance, but I've been timing myself), there is another unpaved trail that goes to the left. I think this is part of the horse trail, but I decided that we would take that trail today. The biggest benefit is that I don't have to have Noni on the leash when we aren't on the paved trail. So, we followed this trail through the woods, the beautiful dappled forest. It was so peaceful! The trail met up with the paved trail again just about where a bridge crosses a creek. This is when my timer went off... So I know that if I take the unpaved trail, it is about 20 minutes to walk out. As I didn't care too much about getting back too fast (who wants to get back to homework?) we took the unpaved trail through the woods on the other side of the paved trail to get back. This trail goes closer to the river. I took this picture:

I didn't get any pictures of the forest part of the walk. This part was more strenuous than the normal trail. More uphills/downhills. Much more of a workout in the same amount of time. I think I'll take this trail more often.

Busy Day!

2010-03-20T21:34:00.000-08:00

After a very fitful and sleepless night last night, I woke up fairly early (9am, but I didn't fall asleep until around 5:30). I had breakfast and lounged around my bedroom, reveling in my self-proclaimed day off. I have been focusing on my school work so intently lately that I don't remember the last time I actually cleaned my house... You know, laundry and dishes done as needed (nothing else to wear or nothing else to eat off of) and basically ignoring everything else. Yes, I know, I tend to live like a slob...

So, I took a few baby steps today and starting cleaning my bedroom. When Aaron is home, this room is our bedroom/family room/dining room/etc. We tend to watch movies or catch up on shows on Hulu using our computer up there... Which also means that this room is usually very messy... I'm talking McDonalds bags stacked on top of the dog kennel (Aaron uses this in place of a night stand), dog hair and flying magazines all over the floor, etc... So, while watching one of my guilty pleasures, I started cleaning...

Then I did something for myself. Recently, my wardrobe has declined to maybe 4 shirts that I can wear and 1 pair of jeans (that fit right), as I am currently in-between sizes right now. I know I could just wear the pants that I have that are too big, but when you are a little thick in the middle, you don't want to wear tapered-leg pants... So a friend of mine went shopping with me at the local consignment store. We actually came away with some really cute things. I picked out 4 skirts for work, a nice sweater, a nice top, a jacket I can use to go walking with Noni, and 3 pairs of shoes... Quite a haul on a small budget.

When I got back from shopping, I had a snack and took Noni for a walk (you know, to try out the new jacket... oh yeah, and because I have a goal to go walking with Noni for at least 30 minutes per day for the next 2 weeks). It was a gorgeous day here! I decided that we were going to walk the Dike Trail (a walking trail that goes around the airport). So we started heading that direction and found out they are doing construction on the access road to the trail and that the trail was closed... Bummer... So we took the long way home to get my 30 minutes in. I'm hoping that tomorrow is going to be nice again. The trail is open on Sundays, so I think we'll try it again! Get an hour walk in!

Then, for dinner, I made some chicken-rice soup. I've been on a kick to just throw what ever I have on hand in the pot... I stopped short of adding my frozen brussels sprouts to the pot (don't judge) but I think when I reheat the leftovers, I'll add some frozen broccoli. I didn't want to add the broccoli to the whole batch, because it gets nasty the longer it is in the cooking liquid. I want it to be warmed through and bright green, not gross green looking. I think a variation on this soup will be a staple for me, especially when Aaron is gone. It'll be the "clean the freezer and pantry" soup. I just add whatever I have on hand. Today was canned chicken, carrots, celery, onions, garlic, a couple handfuls of brown rice, a bunch of chicken broth, and seasonings. I thought I had some frozen corn in the fridge... I was going to add it, but I didn't have any...

Another outlet!

2010-03-20T01:34:00.000-08:00

Technically, this has been in cyber-space on the PWC private site since I joined over a year ago. But, with the wonderful addition of our public site, I felt I needed to share it with everyone, not just my ladies on the private site. So, click here if you want to read what I wrote about living and flying in Alaska (at least an introduction to)...

Keep checking back there for more installments. I plan to write about all the fun things (or sometimes not-so-fun things) that we do with the plane here in Juneau.

WWHD

2010-03-18T22:02:00.003-08:00

This PARODY was brought to my attention on the PWC, and I just had to share it with everyone! Keep in mind, it is a PARODY... I have no idea what the translation from German to English is, and pretend you don't either... It's funnier that way!

To set the scene... Remember those Northwest Pilots that overflew MSP? Let's see how Adolf Hitler takes the news of a similar situation...

"...take away their precious hats..." - The Funniest Line EVER! (at least in aviation parodies)

Turkey Chili

2010-03-15T20:12:00.000-08:00

I am slowly integrating some gluten-free items into my diet. I have been on a really big soup kick lately and Aaron doesn't really like to eat it for dinner. So, since I put him on an airplane back to Bethel this morning, bring on the soup!

I picked up veggies and meat to try to make soup tonight. I decided I would try to make some Turkey Chili. I have another soup planned for St. Pats that requires beef, so I didn't want regular chili. I also don't like chili. I avoid eating it every chance I get. So, this is the big trial... Can I eat something that I don't normally like because it is gluten-free...

So here is my recipe for Turkey Chili... I didn't really start with one, I just started throwing stuff in. So far, it tastes pretty good!

1-2 lbs. Turkey (I used "strips" because that is what I found at the store... you could use ground...)
roughly 2 tbs. flour seasoned with salt & pepper (I realize that I said earlier that this recipe is gluten-free... I don't have any flour in the house that isn't wheat based, so I used what I have... I'll experiment later with gluten-free flour, or omit altogether if I use ground turkey)
2 tbs. olive oil
2 stalks of celery, cut in approx. 1/4-1/2 inch bits
2 carrots, cut about the same size as celery
1 white onion, roughly chopped
3 cloves of garlic, finely minced
1 jalapeno, finely minced (I minced the garlic and jalapeno together in a slap-chop type device)
2 orange bell peppers (I used orange because I like orange, use whatever kind you like)
2-3 cups of chicken stock
1 6 oz can of tomato paste
1 can of red kidney beans
1 can of cannelloni beans

I also used the following seasonings, to taste (your taste preferences may differ)

So, I started by prepping the veggies. When I was ready to start cooking, I dredged the turkey bits in the flour mixture, heated the olive oil in a crock pot, and browned the turkey. When the turkey was cooked, I added the jalapeno/garlic mixture to the pot and sauteed a bit. Then I added the other aromatics to saute for about 5 minutes. Then I added the orange peppers. Once the veggies start to soften, add the seasoning mix. I didn't measure the seasonings... If I were to guess, I would say that I used about 1-1 1/2 tsp of each of the New Mexico Red Chili and the Cumin. Salt, pepper, and the other rosemary mix were added to taste. Stir the veggie/meat mix to disperse the seasonings throughout. Mix some of the chicken broth with the tomato paste and add the the rest of the chicken broth and loosened tomato paste into the pot... Simmer for about 10-15 minutes. Drain, rinse, and add the beans. Keep simmering for a while. I also added some steamed rice from my fridge that was left over from some Chinese take-out a few days ago. It worked out to about a cup of pre-cooked rice... The finished product looks like this:

I'll be taking some for leftovers tomorrow for lunch, and freezing the rest. I'll let everyone know how the fridge/freezer effects the chili.

New Public Site!

2010-03-11T09:46:00.000-09:00

After many months of frustration, the public site for Pilot Wives Club is up! If you haven't done so already, check it out at http://www.pilotwivesclub.com/. We have resources available for our pilots, blog posts written by pilot wives for pilot wives, and contact information if you would like to advertise on our site or sponsor our upcoming meet-up. You can also go to the Pilot Wife Gouge and see a list of Pilot Wife resources and other blogs.

If you have any suggestions for what you would like to see on the Pilot Wives Club website, you can either comment here or send a message through the site.

Welcome!

Healthy Ways to Blow Off Steam

2010-03-09T11:12:00.000-09:00

After a really crappy day, I have the need to blow off some steam... Yesterday was just such a day... I was caustic and vile and irritated and a whole lot of other adjectives... My husband helped me through my afflictions by providing me with the necessary liquor and awesomely-destructive movies to help get me throught the funk... I enjoyed watching the justice and violence of Boondock Saints (and really want to watch the second one now) while drinking a couple of margaritas and a long-island iced-tea. Being the responsible person that I am, my imbibing happened at home. This combo definitely did the trick...

I'm not saying what I did last night to deal with my frustration was healthy... in fact, far from it. Due to my RA, everytime I have more that 1 serving of alcohol, my joints become extremely stiff and sore the next day (I don't get hangovers unless I really take it over the top... I'm talking about being sick-drunk... never again...). I drink massive amounts of water the next day, so that helps. I try not to do this more than once or twice a year... You know, everything in moderation...

Which brings me to my question... What do you do to relieve stress? Do you go running? Do you kick a punching bag? Do you scream? Do you cry? What are considered healthy ways to work through issues? I'm not being rhetorical here, I'm really asking... I have a feeling that I will have many more of those kinds of days in the future and I would like to mix it up a bit... I can't always run to the bottle for my outlet and I don't want to. So comment and tell me what you do to blow off steam. I look forward to reading the responses I get :)

Schitzophrenic Psycho...

2010-03-08T11:39:00.000-09:00

In my continuing boycott of all things Taylor Swift, I have switched my online radio station to "Big R Radio-Alternative Rock". I enjoy alternative rock, but I usually listen to "Solo Piano" as my desk is in the front office and alternative rock isn't very appropriate for everyone to listen to...

However, lately, I've been listening to alternative rather than piano. I've been doing tasks that do not require a whole lot of thought, so I can listen to songs with words.

This brings me to the point of my post... Big R Radio has been playing a song where the lyrics go "Maybe I'm the one who is the schitzophrenic psycho..." I don't know who sings this song, or even the background behind it. The first time I heard this song, I kind of chuckled and my co-worker couldn't believe that there is a song with such lyrics. Every time I've heard it since then, I proclaim that I am a schitzophrenic psycho and we all laugh... Good times... (This post in no way is making fun of such people who are aflicted with schitzophrenia... just the song)

So, these are the things that I have to listen to because I refuse to listen to Taylor Swift. I wish I could listen to other stations, but she is EVERYWHERE! I'm still working on building a Taylor Swift-free iPod, but I'm not quite there yet. Until then, my options are alternative rock or classical... She has yet to infiltrate those genres so far...

Thanks for reading this really pointless post. :)

It is done...

2010-03-03T21:55:00.000-09:00

With the help of my lovely husband, Noni has been given a full haircut. Poor baby had twigs and pine needles stuck inside the hairballs on her feet... She feels much better now. Behold! This thing I shaved again! (2 Points to the first person who can tell me what that reference is from... Aaron, you don't count)

She also got a bath tonight. Who doesn't smell like dog-ass? Noni doesn't smell like dog-ass!

10 Years Ago...

2010-03-02T19:44:00.000-09:00

... I married the love of my life. We were very young. We were very naive. We've had trips, stumbles, and falls. Our first year of marriage was far from being "roses". Through it all, we've learned, we've loved, and we've lived (and yes, I realize how corny that sounds...)

I'm looking forward to a lifetime with Aaron. I feel that after 10 years, we are finally coming in to our own.

The Attack of the Hedge Clippers (aka: Noni Naked Leg...)

2010-02-26T22:47:00.000-09:00

When I have a chance, and Noni has the patience, I try to give her a hair cut. I've not been too adamant about giving her a haircut after what happened last year the night before I went to Chicago for the first PWC meetup. While grooming my dog, I stepped on her grooming tools and twisted my knee pretty badly. I guess you could say I've been pretty gun-shy since then.

Noni has been needing a hair cut for a long while now. I'm talking about her legs being a continuous hairball... Yeah, I know... I'm a bad mommy... Moving on...

This week, I've been giving her a haircut a little at a time. Today, I attacked one of the legs... Most of the hairball on her front leg is gone... Behold! This thing I shaved!

I found this hilarious. I'll probably leave her like this for the comic value for a while yet. Maybe we'll go for a walk tomorrow so the whole neighborhood can see her! We all need something to laugh about these days. Especially me after the week I had. So, enjoy this humiliating picture of my dog and laugh with glee! I know I will :)

(BTW, no real hedge clippers were used in the making of this picture...)

Where's Jen?

2010-02-25T22:03:00.000-09:00

This is the line I use in my subject line at work if I have to step out for a bit. It helps my coworkers know when I am not in the office. Sometimes I feel like I need to announce it to my readers as well... Maybe not all the time, but occasionally like now, when I've been absent for a while or if I expect to be...

I feel like I've been going in so many different directions. I have my responsibilities as a wife. I have my responsibilities in my career. I have my responsibilities with the Pilot Wives Club and many others. I have recently added school to my mix with the hopes of obtaining my degree. With so much on my plate, I have a hard time finding balance.

So, Where's Jen? In the mix of everything I have going on, where do I find time for me? I've been struggling with this for a while now. I feel like I've lost myself along the way. I am on a search for balance, for my identity back. Keep checking back for updates and any tips I find along my new path.

Going Vegan and Gluten-Free (maybe)...

2010-02-20T00:29:00.001-09:00

I was sick last week with some nasty illness that was going around my office. It caused severe fatigue, mild fever, and a VERY persistent cough. So persistent that my boss (who was sick the week before me) is STILL coughing... (I don't have the persistent cough, just an occasional one...)

When I got sick, the major symptoms lasted MAYBE 2 days... I have a theory on this (and it has yet to be corroborated, although it makes sense)... I think that when I got sick, my (sometimes overactive) immune system went into overdrive to fight it. Yay! But in doing so, it jump-started my autoimmune disease that had not been active for several years now. Sucky! I'm talking about my Rheumatoid Arthritis. Ever since last week, my joints have hurt a lot more than normal... Joints that haven't bothered me in the past... Before, it was really just my right knee (the one that gave me problems that resulted in my diagnosis) and sometimes my hips/low back area. Now, it's both my shoulders, both my hips, my low back, both my knees, my ankles, my elbows, and my thumbs. Don't get me wrong, I know that sounds like a lot, but I can still move around. At this point, I'm just in more overall pain than I was before. On a scale of 1-10, I'm at about a 2... But it's a constant 2...

I have been doing research on how diet affects disease, specifically autoimmune disease, for one of my classes at school. I've been researching diets for Rheumatoid Arthritis, Multiple Sclerosis, Lupus, and several others. In addition, I've been looking into the potential causes of autoimmune disease to see if a crappy diet can contribute to the onset of autoimmune disease. Most of my sources believe that autoimmune diseases are triggered by an outside source (such as a virus, bacteria, allergen, etc), which leads me to believe that my RA is progressing.

So far, the most beneficial diet to RA sufferers is a gluten-free vegan diet. Studies have shown that patients with RA have seen a decrease in their symptoms and overall better health and weight loss after being on a gluten-free vegan diet, as opposed to, say, a vegetarian diet or a modified diet of meat/dairy/fruits/veggies that balances your food intake.

If my arthritis is progressing (as I suspect), I would like to do more to treat it than take prescriptions for the pain, or the immuno-suppressant drugs that leave you open to a "potentially fatal infection." I refuse to take any of that ~~poison~~ medicine. Right now, my doctor is on vacation. When she returns, I will be discussing my suspicions with her to see if it is possible that my RA is progressing. Then, I'll look at what it would mean for me to go vegan and gluten-free... I understand the health benefits I would get from it, but I don't know if I COULD go vegan and gluten-free... I like my animal products too much... I really like bread... Maybe I'll phase myself into a gluten-free diet to try things out, like substituting a gluten-free flour (like rice flour) in some of my recipes... We'll see. I wonder what my husband would think if I needed to go vegan and gluten-free... Would he support me by doing it with me, or would support me, but continue to eat what he currently does... Only time will tell, but it would probably be the latter...

In doing some research on what it means to be vegan, I have come to the conclusion that, if I must be on a vegan diet, it is strictly for health reasons. I believe that animals are part of the food chain and we can and should eat them. I see no problem with eating eggs. If I can have eggs, then I would be an ovo-vegitarian and not a vegan. Just like I don't "go green" for the sake of being green, I won't go vegan for the sake of being vegan.

Ice Pilots

2010-02-15T14:27:00.001-09:00

I heard about a Canadian TV Show from SPW called Ice Pilots. My husband heard about it from another source and found a place online where you could see the episodes, since it doesn't play in the US. We are hooked on the show and watched it constantly while he was home the last 10 days. It very accurately depicts pilots who prefer to fly older prop equipment in the north, not that different from what my husband does, although the planes are different. They even show their own version of "As the Propellar Turns" (my name for the soap-opera type drama that happens at a "smaller" airline).

Check it out if you dare! See the other side to being a captain (you know, the side that doesn't include a uniform - unless Carharts are a uniform - and doesn't reek of jet fuel).

Click here to see Ice Pilots!

SO IRRITATED...

2010-02-15T06:37:00.001-09:00

... AND FRUSTRATED AND PISSED OFF AND EMOTIONAL.

Why does he have to pick a fight the morning he leaves to go back to work? Why does he need to make me feel 3 inches tall? He pissed me off so bad this morning that I didn't even kiss him good bye... I just deposited his luggage on the curb and said "BYE!!!" (with a few choice words thrown in for good measure). I know, this makes me a really bad pilot wife, but I get so mad when he treats me that way. I should just let it roll off my back, but it is hard when the "little" screw-ups (like tilting his computer bag in such a way that the candy in the front pocket leaks out when I didn't know there was candy loose in his bag) become something for him to demean me over. 6:00 AM on my day off does not put me in the best of moods to begin with, and having to deal with his crappy attitude for having to go back to Bethel is just icing on the cake. I deserve a little more respect than what I got this morning. I am not some dumb-shit moron who doesn't know what she is doing, so please don't treat me as such.

Decisions, decisions...

2010-02-13T16:55:00.001-09:00

Do I have my husband work for a company that I feel has questionable business practices, but will have him home every night?

or

Do I have him continue to work for a company several hundreds of miles away, taking him away for 2-3 weeks at a time, with the possibility that in a year, they MAY open a route down here and transfer him home?

Decisions, decisions...

I am all for having him come home... But I am not sure about the company he wants to work for that is here. If it is not going to be a good company to work for, then he just gave up his seniority at the other company for nothing... I just don't know.

I know he is extremely unhappy with commuting to Bethel, and all that entails, but I don't want him to take a potentially unsafe position with a new company just to get out of Bethel... I guess I'll have to meet the owner and see how their current operation is handled. My observations are about 2 years old, so they could have changed their ways... If they have, this would be a great thing for us! But if not, it would be a lot of worry on my part, even if he would be flying locally (maybe especially because he would be flying locally).

Hobbling through life...

2010-02-04T08:48:00.000-09:00

I find it amazing that I can cause serious injury to myself and not know when I did it. At some point in time (probably around Sunday of last week) I did something to my ankle that got worse over time. I made an appointment to get it checked out, and turns out I sprained it... huh...

It reminds me of the time that I went to bed healthy and woke up with a sprained ankle... I suspect that I got my foot caught between my mattress and the wall and I rolled the wrong way while asleep. Here's the weird part... the pain didn't wake me up... Once asleep, I sleep so deep that nothing short of a major earthquake will wake me up (you can ask Aaron if you want to on that one... it takes him a while to wake me up when I am asleep). I woke up and got out of bed and tried to walk and I couldn't... It took several days before I was able to put weight on my foot...

This sprain isn't nearly as bad. I can still put weight on it, but the doctor has me taping my ankle for added support for a few days. She'll check it out again next week to see if it is getting better, then determine if I need to continue wrapping or if I need an x-ray. Until then, I'll be hobbling though life. : )

Happy Marmot Day!

2010-02-01T21:15:00.000-09:00

Here in Alaska, we celebrate Marmot Day (as opposed to Groundhog Day)...

Actually, I just found out about this change today when I checked our local paper. Someone decided that since groundhogs are not indigenous to Alaska, and marmots are, we should officially change. The article did say that there is no weather predicting power that comes with the title and day, but it's not like that would actually work here... Maybe the marmot should be put in charge of something equally ridiculous...Any suggestions?

Tired...

2010-01-28T22:23:00.000-09:00

This batch of classes is definitely more challenging than the last. I've stayed up late every night this week working on assignments and cleaning my house little by little. I have another assignment due tomorrow and I have to finish the housework before my guests arrive on Saturday. Shopping, cleaning, studying... leaves very little time for sleep. I am glad (at the moment) that Aaron is at work. If he were home, he would not be happy about how much time I am spending on my other commitments. I wish I was able to fit a housekeeper (at least once a week) into my budget to help me keep ahead of everything. It would be nice to wake up in the morning and not be out of clean socks because I forgot to put a load of laundry in the wash...

Chicken soup...

2010-01-24T22:02:00.000-09:00

There is nothing better when you don't feel well than chicken soup... I felt better today than I have all weekend, but I woke up with the same headache that I have had since Friday night. I know it probably has to do with the fact that I haven't really eaten much since I got the news about my grandma. So, today I ventured out and got some ingredients and made some chicken soup.

While it was cooking, I received phone calls from various family members. I was so great to talk to them after the initial shock. My aunt was the first one that I talked to. My grandmother lived with her and my uncle, so this has been really hard on her. We were able to get through the majority of our conversation without breaking down, so that must be progress. She gave me some pointers about the soup, and we spoke about my grandma.

I was able to eat my soup, and think about my grandma, and know that she loved me. She will always be with me. Her traditions will live on, and I will cherish the memories that I have.

I look forward to receiving her final gift to me. She intended to give it to me for Christmas, but hadn't been able to send it yet. It will be my most cherished item from her. My aunt will send it to me. But, she is keeping my grandma's secret. I have no idea what it is. I only know that it is a special gift, reserved just for her granddaughters.

Grieving alone...

2010-01-23T13:46:00.000-09:00

As a pilot wife, I have become accustomed to spending holidays and birthdays alone... I never thought I would have to grieve alone...

Being so isolated from my family has strengthened my relationship with my husband. He is my best friend, my rock, my support... It is so difficult to have to go through this alone, with him so far away and unable to come home.

I wish he were here... To be a shoulder to cry on... To be the one to bring me something to eat... To sneak a sleeping pill into my drink so I can get some sleep... To just be here...

Thank you for all your nice comments. While it doesn't address my immediate need, it is a great support to me in this time.

Wracked with grief...

2010-01-22T16:02:00.000-09:00

I never fully comprehended this phrase until today...

My grandmother passed away this afternoon... The woman who I am most like, in stature and personality, is gone. She was a wonderful example of strength and resilience. She always had enough love to give to all her grandchildren, even when they irritated her (as I did on several occasions).

My boss sent me home after finding me sobbing at my desk (I got the call while I was at work). I called Aaron, who is in Bethel. I'm not sure yet if he will be able to come home at this time or not. He'll let me know later tonight. I kept it together enough to drive home, but as soon as I got in the door, I cried like I haven't in a very long time. I had one of those crying jags that makes you sick. I am crying as I write this now, but it's a much more subdued version, with the occasional hiccup or sniffle.

I will think of her often and miss her dearly...

EWWWW!!!!!!

2010-01-20T10:53:00.000-09:00

I have found where the mice are coming in to my house... At least, I think I did... But I need Aaron to help me confirm...

I walked in to my kitchen last night to get a snack, when I spotted something on my counter... Of course I screamed like someone was killing me! You would have too! Don't deny it! I watched it run super-fast across the counter, across the stove, and behind the stove... I think they are crawling up the cord? Who knows...

Of course, my over-reaction/freakout over a mouse just got Noni all excited! She had to go sniff EVERYWHERE! to find what I was screaming about... At least now, I can say "Noni, where's that mouse" and she'll start looking for it, thus keeping it (and any others) in it's little hidey hole for a while longer...

I may send cotton balls with peppermint on them behind the stove, but that may drive them further into my house to avoid the smell (especially if they are already IN my house when I bomb it with peppermint)... On second thought, that might not be a good idea right now...

I have plans (when Aaron comes home, of course) to move the stove, see what's what, clean the area, and stop up any holes that we can with steel wool... Then I'll peppermint the heck out of the area... Maybe this will prompt us moving the fridge and/or dishwasher to see what's what there too...

My life, in review...

2010-01-18T23:17:00.000-09:00

I had a very long list of things to do today... I didn't do any of them... Let's start from the beginning...

This morning, I woke up, got dressed, made a bowl of cereal and decided to start watching my Charmed complete series (I did not expect to watch the ENTIRE series today, but I did start watching it today)... That is when I discovered that my Collectors Edition "Book of Shadows" has a manufacturer's error and half of the discs are contaminated with glue. I have a few things I am going to try to remove the glue before I request replacements. So, that started my day.

That moved me upstairs to my computer, where I found out that others had the same problem. While here, I checked my previous classes for school to see if my final grade had been published for my second class. It had. I also completed that class with an A! (Yeah, I know... I rock!)

That kept me on my computer, doing a little celebrating, playing games on Facebook, reading other blogs...

And I got caught up in my own. I'm not sure just what inspired me to do this, but I read my blog from beginning to end. I've heard of stalking other blogs in this fashion, but your own? Does that mean I'm certifiable?

I had forgotten many things over the last year and a half... Many things I was pleasantly amused with. Sometimes, I think I'm pretty funny (or at least, I try to be). I also noticed that many things I set out to do are still undone. I never did achieve my goal of being back to a size 10 by 29. I never did completely organize my office. I still haven't gotten Aaron to clean up on his side of the bed before he leaves for work... It makes me think that I'm not as productive as I think I am or want to be... It's kind of depressing, actually... I'm not sure if it is due to my schedule or the fact that I am pretty lazy...

So reading about my life, as I wrote it, took up my whole day. I didn't do the laundry that I had planned to. I didn't clean my house as I intended to (while watching Charmed)... I didn't start clearing out my office... I didn't start reading my assignment for the week... I didn't do anything but reintroduce myself to myself..

Here's hoping that I am motivated enough in 2010 to accomplish SOMETHING that I have put "out there" on my blog... I want to say that I'll make that a goal, but I can see that my track record proves otherwise...

Sad Sunday

2010-01-17T12:35:00.000-09:00

Aaron went back to work today. I missed his call when he was checking in to say he made it on the flight from Anchorage to Bethel. I hope he isn't over-doing it today. Yesterday, we had so much activity that we were both worried that he would exacerbate his mouth issues.

As for yesterday, we got almost everything accomplished, except for cleaning the house, doing my schoolwork, and working on the PWC site. I'm glad it's a 3-day weekend so I have a little bit of time to work on stuff.

We got the tree down (and I have the scratches, cuts, and puncture wounds to prove it), but neither of us had the energy (let alone, a ladder) to put it back in the attic. I am going to do some cleaning/reorganizing of my office and it will come up here for a while. When he gets back home in February, he'll make arrangements for someone to assist him in putting the Christmas stuff in the attic.

I slept longer than I intended today (I try to get up by 9 on the weekends, so my work week isn't so fatiguing). But, I figured since I had to get up at 5:30 to take him to the airport, I could sleep in a little later. I am still really tired and may end up taking a nap later today. We'll see how I am then.

I still have a paper to write, so I better get on it. Hopefully, the research I did yesterday morning will make it easier for me to write so I can get to my other chores.

Checklist for Today

2010-01-16T12:44:00.000-09:00

1. Go to the hanger to get the cardboard that has been sitting in the corner since we moved in almost a year ago...

2. Go to my office and get the cardboard and other recyclables there to maximize my trip to the dump.

3. Take all recyclables to the dump to be recycled

4. Go back to the hanger to assemble a router table that Aaron was given (since all of his tools are there)

5. Come back to the house with the router table assembled and put in the garage.

6. Clean the house

7. Take down the Christmas Tree

8. Draft paper that is due tomorrow

9. Find time to help work on the PWC website with Summer.

10. Go shopping to get Aaron's supplies for Bethel.

11. Get Aaron packed so he can go back to work tomorrow...

(and most of the day is gone already... hopefully we'll fit in lunch & dinner in there somewhere...)

Ready, set....

2010-01-15T22:58:00.000-09:00

....... Sleep!

I wish... I've been really sleep-deprived this week... All the activity yesterday and today hasn't helped...

And we still have our Christmas tree up.... Ugh... I have a Pampered Chef party scheduled at my house at the end of the month and I have a feeling that I will end up taking it down by myself again. Aaron is feeling much better today, but he's still technically recovering, so he shouldn't do too much. He's also thinking of going back to work on Sunday, which means that all day tomorrow we'll be running around gathering what he needs to take to Bethel with him so we can get up at 5 AM on Sunday so he can catch the first jet to Anchorage... I abhor 5 AM on a Sunday... Sunday is the day of rest, and I don't get enough of it...

I started to take a nap this evening, while Aaron tried to get my anti-virus program to work. (I bought it 3 months ago and it won't get past the installation stage on this computer, but works fine on my netbook). True to form, as soon as I start dozing off, he comes in and starts talking at me... He expected a response too... Ugh... Whenever he wakes me up, it takes FOREVER to fall back to sleep, hence the sleep deprivation. I kind of wish he would get better and go back to work so I can get a decent night sleep... But that's just me being selfish.

How do you moms do it? I don't know if I could handle this level of exhaustion for long periods of time...

Sorry for the rambling, crazy, crabby, rant... As you can probably deduce, I am exhausted and will be turning my computer off shortly to try to get some sleep... We'll see...

I guess I will accept that it is winter...

2010-01-14T19:34:00.000-09:00

The ice-covered Apache has returned to my header... I guess that means it is January and I should expect winter to last another 4 months...

I think that this is one of the few times that I wish I were in Hawaii... But maybe with the option to travel between Alaska and Hawaii as often as I want for variety...

You'll know I'm sick of winter when my blog has the look of a luau.

He gets a pass...

2010-01-14T19:15:00.000-09:00

Aaron's surley and downright mean mood lately is excused...

He had to have emergency oral surgery today to address an abscess in one of his molars that was effecting the nerve. He didn't sleep at all last night. He was overwhelmingly crabby today (and rightly so). We found him a new dentist (and he likes the new dentist, so SCORE!) and they took a look and it was abscessed. Luckily, the infection hadn't spread to the surrounding teeth, yet. And it was lucky that the oral surgeon could get him in so quickly. He no longer has the 2nd from the back molar on his right side. He will also be in some pretty good pain for a while, at least once the really good meds wear off. I'm sure vicoden will be his friend for at least a couple of days. I'm really glad that the severe pain is over and all he has to deal with now is the ache of healing. He also has to take antibiotics to get rid of the infection, but he's on the right path.

I am keeping him home from work for a few extra days. He was scheduled to go back to work tomorrow, but there is no way in hell I was putting him on a plane when he was screaming in pain... And no way I'm sending him up there until it heals for a couple more days. I'm hoping he will stay home till Monday. That will give him ample time to heal up a bit more and get into a routine of maintenance.

Hard work and sacrifices...

2010-01-13T21:51:00.000-09:00

It's amazing how much hard work pays off...but are the sacrifices you have to make for the result worth it?

I received my final grade for one of my classes that I just completed last week. I finished it with 100%! Yay me! I was so excited! I immediately ran into the other room, joyously exclaiming to my husband that I got an A! All my hard work paid off!

His response... yay.

A little anti-climactic, don't you think?

I know he's been a little (or a lot) frustrated with my schedule this week. He was disappointed when I started my new classes on Monday. He's been wanting my attention all week, complaining that as soon as I get home from work, I (might) eat dinner, then I disappear in my office until I'm ready for bed.

Which, for the most part, is true. I only have 4 hours a day to do my school work and turn it in on-time, thanks to the time difference between where I live and where my school is based. That's not a lot of time to prepare responses and finalize assignments, or read a chapter of a text book in one night...

So, I guess I have been isolating myself a lot lately. But I don't see any other way to handle my school work right now. I try to work at least one day ahead on my assignments, so I don't HAVE to push it every night. I can take a few hours to spend time with my husband. But sometimes, it doesn't work out that way.

I have to think to myself, is all the work I'm putting into getting my degree worth it in the end if my relationship suffers? On one hand, I know it is very important to our life that I have my degree. I also know that Aaron can't have everything he wants, when he wants it. On some level, he needs to grow up and accept the fact that I need to do this. But I also don't want to completely cut myself off from him, especially when he is only home for 2 weeks at a time. I would much rather spend my time hanging out with him than debating whether or not capital punishment is a good thing... I don't want him to think that my priorities in life are WORK-SCHOOL-AARON... As you can see, I'm very conflicted...

So, how do I handle all my responsibilities? My career, my education, my husband? Do I drop out of school (again) so that I can be there for him? Do I tell him to let me do what I need to do? Do I drop to part-time at work and live frugally? Or do I just keep working like I have been and hope that he gets used to it? I have no idea.

I have started working on my homework downstairs, where he generally is. While this helps to satisfy his need to spend time with me (as he is usually on his computer anyway, with his focus split), this doesn't help me to actually complete an assignment. It is difficult to concentrate on my task at hand when he tries to carry on a conversation with me while I'm typing a response or reading a section in my text book.

He goes back to work on Friday. I have shut myself in my office this evening to allow me to focus on my assignments that are due tomorrow. If I have them done and submitted tonight, then I won't have to do any school work tomorrow and I can spend his last night home with him. Again, another sacrifice. Avoiding him tonight so I can spend time with him tomorrow...

Waiting...

2010-01-11T16:58:00.000-09:00

What am I waiting for, you ask? Well:

I'm waiting for the snow to stop... Yes, I'm aware that I live in Alaska, and it is winter, but after the holidays, the snow gets depressing... And it's been snowing all day today so the roads are crap and I'll probably have to shovel my way to my front door when I get home... (sigh)

I'm waiting for my work day to end... Yes, I am aware that I am spending the last 10 minutes I should be working on something personal, but "thems the brakes" (I don't know where I picked up that particular phrase, but it seemed appropriate in the moment). Once I get home, I'll be busy with dinner and school, so this is the only time I have to update everyone on my goings-on...

I am waiting for my ride... My husband took the car this afternoon and went to play at the hanger... Usually when he does this, he is about 10 minutes late picking me up from work, so I don't feel too bad about the other 10 minutes, referenced above...

I'm waiting for bed-time... I need a decent night sleep... Despite a headache last night, Aaron was well enough to chatter at me all night... Even when he could see that my glasses were off, my eyes were closed, and I was all snuggled in bed, he proceeded to carry on a conversation with me (after midnight, no less)... Yeah, as soon a I would just start to doze, he would demand an answer or response to something he just said, or something he just saw on TV... (sigh)... If I didn't love him so much, I probably would have smacked him...

I'm waiting for... uh... I think that's about it... At least, for the moment. It'll be nice once the post-final brain-hurt (I think I just made up a word... not quite a headache, but that mild grogginess that you get in your brain when it has been overworked... just sayin) is done and I can think clearly again.

It's almost time to go home... Where's my sled-dog team?

I love my man!

2010-01-09T23:04:00.000-09:00

During this crazy-hectic-busy week for me, Aaron has been a gem. Not only has he completed the work on the kitchen and finished painting the wall that he started painting well over a year ago, but he has been keeping up with the housework too! I have been so spoiled. Every time I turn around, a pile has been put away. The never-ending supply of dirt and pine needles that get tracked in by the dog has been swept up almost as soon as it hits the floor. The dishes have been loaded in the dishwasher and RUN! I am so freaking amazed and surprised and thankful. Where did this behavior come from? Probably from actually doing work on the house. He wants it to look nice, and since he knows I don't have the time to devote to it right now (finals going on at the moment), and he's not doing much, that he can do it! I feel so loved at the moment that he is allowing me to split my focus to finish my classes (the new ones start on Monday). I wanted him to know how much I appreciate everything he's been doing for me lately.

Love you, honey!